Steps to Survive
by vixenia
Summary: KagXSess: Kagome no longer wishes to follow Inuyasha blindy and has decided her destiny must be taken into her own hands. One night alone in the woods with a certain lord has her realizing that it will take more than bows and arrows to survive in this war stricken era. Set 2 years later.
1. The beginning

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, or the characters in this fiction, only the plot is all I will take credit for.

Chapter 1

Sometimes, it is really amazing how long it takes for someone to get a clue. I mean really, it has been what, two years that I have been fawning over Inuyasha? In love with him? No, I'm not quite sure that is what it should be called. Puppy love maybe. Blind as a bat following some sound waves in the atmosphere probably. But love? No, this can't be what you call love.

They say sometimes all it takes is a slap in the face to wake up to reality, and as I stare into the water of the lake I'd taken refuge next to, all I could see was a bright red handprint taking residence on the left side of my face. If that is not a wake up call, I don't know what is. You would think I'd learn. That after years, not days, not months, but YEARS of being yelled at, called every bad name in the book, being left for the "other woman" time and time again, I would have realized that Inuyasha is not the one for me, nor was he interested one bit.

But no, it took a slap in the face from our oh so great hero to make me realize I've wasted my time, hell, I've wasted my life. The reason for the hideous mark to my once unblemished face? Because mother couldn't afford to buy ramen for his butt anymore because ramen cost money, even if it wasn't that expensive, and it was money my mother no longer had. She has to start saving what minimal funds she had for Souta to go to high school because at least someone from our family needed to graduate, and lets just face it, odds were not in my favor on this one.

My blue eyes stared back at me, listless and confused eyes that were so lost that tears still haven't found them yet. Or maybe all the stinging sensation is determined to stay in that one awful spot on my face and decided to leave my eyes alone. Whatever the reason, I could not, and will not cry. Okay maybe I might later, but for now I'd rather stick with cold delicious anger. Because right now thats what I need.

Yet, even that was hard to come by as shock seemed to be a very hard feeling to break. Once it went away though, Inuyasha better go ahead and dig his grave himself before I decide to sit him in it. Okay maybe some of the anger had found its way through the shock.

Inuyasha had hit me…wow, yup still in shock. I thought it was supposed to be the bad guys that got beaten up, not the heroine of the story. Then again, I wasn't much of a heroine as much as a walking disaster. I mean, I was the one to break the Shikon jewel in the first place which had in turn caused havoc and despair. As if that wasn't pathetic enough, I can barely protect myself, if being kidnapped at least once a week isn't enough to go by, let alone find these jewel shards unless I'm close by. In the end, I'd call myself pretty useless.

No wonder Inuyasha would rather have his bitter dead ex-girlfriend instead of me. "Okay Kagome, no more pity party, get off your butt and go sit that moron to next week." My legs didn't move. My hands stayed uselessly at my side, as if my strength had left them. Which wouldn't be too surprising. I had after all been walking all day until late evening, when it came down to the last ramen and informing Inuyasha as politely as I could that it would probably be the last one in a really long time. Yeah, that had gone over real well.

A feminine screech caught my attention to my left, and in a heart beat that missing in action strength of mine was back, and I was on my feet searching for the sound. Silence was all that met my ears.

"Hello?" I called out, my voice sounded more garbled then anything, as if something were stuck in the back of my throat. I guess I know where my tears went to. Ignoring the sensation that maybe coming close to a screeching creature, possibly a demon with a penchant for pretty young maidens in short school uniforms, I walked down the dirt path next to the lake to where I had heard the voice. "Is anyone there?" I called out again, slowly walking around the trees that had blocked my view of the unknown, only to come across a young girl who had landed face first in the mud.

Her black hair and once yellow orange kimono were all that I could make out in the destruction. Her hands and feet were slipping and sliding in the brown mud as she tried to get some semblance of traction going for her. "Relax, don't move or it will get worse, I'll pull you up." Well, I guess this is what you call a distraction from reality, but hey, beggars can't be choosers right?

Holding on to what looked to be a sturdy branch, I grabbed the back of her kimono, and slowly dragged her up. "Are you alright?"

Doe brown eyes stared up at me, filled with nothing but childish delight and mischief. I'm pretty sure I've seen those eyes before. Taking in her appearance, the lopsided pigtail, the raven black hair, and that sweet smile that I'd recognize anywhere, I realized it was no other than the girl Rin, who had been following Sesshomaru for the past year and a half.

I've never really talked to her before, at least not long enough for us to really get to know each other. All I knew was that this girl seemed to have attached herself quite firmly to the cold demon lord who supposedly hated all human-kind…except maybe her.

"Lady Kagame!" her voice squealed out, mud already forgotten as she gave my knees a hug. Well at least she hadn't got mud on my clothes. Thats a plus, right? "Rin, what are you doing here all by yourself? Aren't you usually with Lord Sesshomaru…or Jaken?" I really didn't see Sesshomaru as being the irresponsible type to just leave the girl frolicking through the forest alone but then again my sense of judgement apparently isn't as great as I thought.

"Lord Sesshomaru had to take care of something so he left Rin with Lord Jaken but Rin got hungry so Rin left to find food but fell down the hill and landed in the mud but its okay because Lady Kagame helped Rin." she gushed in one breath. Kids are seriously impressive sometimes, like seriously, do they even need oxygen? I gave her the best smile I could, though it felt tight, the stinging on the left side of my face an obvious reminder that today hadn't been the best of days.

"Well before you eat anything, it might be best to get you all washed up, then maybe we can get you something to snack on," I said as I took in the mud dripping from her hair, face, hands…oh lets just face it the girl was a walking, talking Loch ness monster, though in her defense, a cute one.

A bright smile was my reward, which looked priceless with white baby teeth showing in a face covered in mud. Looking at her kimono I couldn't help but sigh. The thing was ruined at best. "Rin…do you by chance have any other kimonos?" Perhaps Sesshomaru bought her a few extras. He's supposed to be a Lord right? Lords have money usually…right?

"Rin has a spare with Ah-Un!" the young raven haired child stated blissfully as she began taking off her ruined wardrobe. "Thats great! Where is he?" I asked as I began toeing of my shoes and socks. My knees were after all filthy and I really didn't want to get my shoes wet trying to wash the mud off.

"Ah-Un is with Lord Sesshomaru!" I just stared. So what she's trying to say is…she doesn't have a clean kimono. I could feel the exasperated sweat drop forming as I took in her happy smile and bright chocolate eyes, obviously not giving her lack of clean attire much thought. Ah to be young again.

Dipping my legs into the water, I once again look at my reflection. Yup, bright red hand print right where I left it…or rather where Inuyasha left it. "What are you doing all the way out here Lady Kagome? Rin thought you were traveling with Lord Sesshomaru's brother." The question only sunk me deeper into my depressing thoughts, so I did the best thing a girl could do. Deny, deny, deny.

"I was just getting away for a little bit, to clear my thoughts." That sounded reasonable enough, but taking one look at her expressive eyes, I could tell she was looking at my face, and she didn't believe me for a second.

"Did Lord Inuyasha do that?" She asked, pointing to her own left cheek. Ah kids, blunt as a bat this one. I could only look away, too embarrassed at being caught in my weak lie. I didn't answer her. Honestly I was still trying to wrap my head around the fact that Inuyasha had indeed been the culprit of her accusation. No wonder Sesshomaru kept this kid around. She might look high on life, but she obviously was intuitive for one so young.

"Rin used to be beat a lot…before Lord Sesshomaru came," she drifted off into her own thoughts after that, her eyes taking on a far away look to a time that no one else could see but her. I stared at the child, my own embarrassment forgotten and shame setting in its place, as I took the young girl in for what felt like the first time.

It was hard to believe one so young had gone through so much, and by the look in her eyes, she had gone through a lot. She couldn't be older then 8 or 9 by now, but then again, in this era what did age matter. It seemed no matter where you looked, someone was suffering a cruel, unjust fate. I felt a twinge of self hatred.

While I was crying over Inuyasha acting like a jerk, maybe more than usual but a jerk who I could have easily sent crashing to the ground with one utterance of subjugation, this little girl had suffered being beat for things that had no rhyme or reason. To the point possibly that a cold hearted Taiyoukai had taken pity on her and saved her (possibly since I have no idea of that story)from a horrible fate.

I should have realized on my own that there was no way that Sesshomaru would have taken in some girl for no reason. There was something about the girl that drew people to her, that made them want to protect her from all the evils in the world, and who better to protect her then possibly the most strongest demon in Japan.

What could I say to her admission. It just didn't feel like a moment to say something soothing or pitying, as I'm sure that was the last thing she wanted to hear. So instead, I grabbed her small hand in mine and led her slightly deeper into the water, not minding as my worn out skirt got wet.

I pulled my sleeves up, I started to slowly wash her arms, starting at first with her muddy hands, working hard into getting the dirt caked under her nails to give way, before continuing up her arms, neck, and face. I then tilted her backwards, allowing her long hair to give the water the illusion of black ink, washing the dirt and grime out the best I could. I suddenly wished I hadn't left my bag back at camp, instead rushing off into the unknown without a thought except to get away from an over irritated half demon.

"Kagome?" I could hear the question in her voice and before I could ask what wrong I felt it. Hot tears started flooding down my face, finally releasing my pent up frustration and sorrow.

Frustration for allowing Inuyasha to push me this far, to make me feel so stupid and ridiculous for chasing after some thing that had never been in reach in the first place and sorrow, for my shattered dreams and expectations, and for this little girl who had seen so much at such a young age. Orphaned like little Shippo was, and yet still could be bright and cheerful because a prince had come and rescued her from her broken dirty castle that only housed dragons for comfort.

"It will get better, it has to," was all I could say, letting Rin's sweet smile and sparkling brown eyes lull me into that belief. If this girl could find her happily ever after under strange circumstances, then maybe there was hope for me too. Maybe, just maybe, I could take charge of my own story. Perhaps now, I could focus less on Inuyasha, and more on Kagame, the girl who had crawled out of the well all those years ago, whom had been strong and confident and wouldn't let any man make her feel less.

Maybe it was time to finally grow up out of this feeling of hopelessness that had been putting a heavy weight in my steps for the past few months, no, years. I gave her a tentative smile as I cleaned her brow, stating only, "Yes, we are not broken, simply bent a little bit, but that can be fixed, with a little tender love and care." All I got was a quick grin before a thick oppressive cloud of youki hit my senses full force, causing a shiver down my spine.

"Lord…Sesshomaru," was all I could whisper as my knees bent under the strength of his will and true fear took over my senses.


	2. No where to go

Thank you everyone who has read/reviewed/favorited/followed this story. It means the world to me. I have been meaning for a long time to write a KagxSess fanfic but didn't know really how to go about it. I will try my best to stick with the plot and not get side tracked. Any advice is welcome, however please keep your criticism constructive, as anything else might cause me to drop off of the fanfic earth again :(

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Inuyasha or the characters portrayed in this fanfiction, however the plot behind it is all mine!

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**Chapter 2: No where to go**

I know its vain, but I think the world is out to get me. I mean, if I logically backtrack to the beginning of this journey, anyone can see luck has never been my strong suit. Then again, I am still alive, so maybe I'm luckier than I thought. Though today, I think I have finally reached the end of the line as I stared into the eyes of the devil, his golden orbs promising a very long painful death, and if he so wished it, a painful afterlife as well.

Sesshomaru was by all means not the kind of demon you wanted to cross paths with, and for some reason, I got that distinct impression that I had indeed found myself on his death list. Though if you think about it, he probably doesn't have a list, because any one who could have been on it is probably already dead. I tried to swallow, but my mouth was dry and my tongue swollen.

He was what you would call perfection. Silver silky hair that came to his knees blew lightly in the wind, not a single strand out of place. Aristocratic features held narrowed golden eyes that would bring any woman happily to her knees if he did not chop them off first. Magenta stripes lined his perfect cheek bones, and thin lips shaped his obvious displeasure. 

He was tall, probably taller than most humanoid demons I had met, and his dark armor seem to assist in making him even more imposing in contrast to his white attire that had blood red designs. One of his sleeves waved ominously, his missing limb seemed to not deter him at all, as if his perfection did not need that extra limb to make him any less deadly. Pointed boots stood proudly on the rock he stood on, every inch of him giving off a warning that no being could ignore.

Rin was laying on her back in the water, her long black tresses ensnared my fingers in their dark embrace, as if keeping me from fleeing the silver haired vision of death. I couldn't breath, but thinking did not seem to be a problem. If thinking and panicking could be counted as the same thing that is.

He just continued to stare at me from his perch on a rather large rock, not saying a word, though I could feel his angry aura fill the entire clearing, sending flocks of birds shrieking as they flew to safety. 

'How lucky of them, what I wouldn't give for wings right now,' I thought miserably as I considered my best chances of leaving this situation with my life.

As slowly as I possibly dared, I began untangling Rin's hair from my pruned fingers, thinking that a little distance from what was causing the lords's ire might be my saving grace, and then stepping away from the child, my eyes never leaving his, flinching as they filled with hellfire, assessing every movement I made with the cold calculation he was known for.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" came a happy cry, as the child turned in the water to face him, her eyes filled with starlight and sparkling merriment. His cold eyes never left my blue ones, not even to glance at his now clean ward. 

Taking notice to the very tense silence and possibly of how her high-esteemed demon lord was eyeing me, Rin decided to help relax the situation. "My lord, Rin was trying to find food because Rin was hungry but slipped and fell in the mud but Lady Kagame helped Rin and helped wash Rin." She stated with all the exuberance that only a child could have in this kind of situation.

Sesshomaru seemed to give no notice to her words as he continued his stare, as if searching for any deceit in my eyes. Apparently, what he found satisfied him, as he now turned those golden eyes towards Rin, where he took a moment to study her appearance, and the slightest movement of his nose gave indication that he was sniffing to determine if she had been injured.

"Rin, where is Jaken," he asked, his voice smooth and fluid, yet raised the hair on my neck all the same.

Rin had the decency to blush, and began fingering circles in the water, as if to ease her mind as she knew that tone meant trouble.

"Lord Jaken was being stupid Lord Sesshomaru, so Rin went to look for food without him." Yeah, even to me that excuse was lame at best, and I could tell Rin had now become the sacrificial lamb to get me out of my hot seat.

"Hn," was all I heard before he turned his back toward us, and began walking away. I couldn't help the sigh of relief that left my already over-taxed lungs, before greedily soaking in as much oxygen as I could to replenish what I had lost since the moment of his appearance. 

I had faced demons that were ten times bigger than Sesshomaru, but that didn't make me believe for one second that he would make them look like child's play, not to mention I had never personally faced any of those demons alone before.

"Sorry Lady Kagome, Rin got you in trouble, are you mad," she mourned as she glanced at me, her pretty brown eyes that just moments ago were filled with childish glee were now shrouded in doubt and concern.

How could I possibly be mad at her. I'm pretty positive even without her help I would have found myself in an equally as terrifying a situation, though I tried to push that thought to the back of my mind.

I gave her a small smile and shook my head, speaking as gently and softly as I could manage, "No Rin, you really saved me back there. Thanks." No sooner than I had said that, Sesshomaru had reappeared with what looked like a clean kimono for Rin. He didn't say anything, just watched silently as Rin made her way over to him. It kind of reminded me of a dog, keeping a careful eye on his unruly pup, a dog with very sharp teeth and the ability to poison you if you piss him off.

I stayed where I was, feeling that distance in this situation might just prolong my life, just in case he changed his mind about letting me live. I observed as Rin first took what looked like a large piece of cloth which she used to dry off. Apparently Lord Sesshomaru kept towels, who knew?

Then a blue kimono was put on with tasteful splashes of white and a yellow obi, the colors giving off the impression of a warm summer sky. For a moment, I wondered if Sesshomaru had picked that out himself or if that was due to Rin's preference. Maybe I shouldn't wonder about these things right now…

Finally dressed, the raven haired girl looked back at me and waved goodbye, before following after Sesshomaru who was already leaving, apparently forgetting about the human who had dared to touch his charge. Rin's dirty kimono was left abandoned, its services no longer needed.

I didn't move for awhile, ignoring how my skirt now clung awkwardly to my legs, or how cold the water was, or that my feet were probably super pruned right now.

"Well, that wasn't so bad," I said encouragingly to myself after a few more moments, finally finding that discarded courage that had done a man over-board when the demon lord first arrived.

I find it pretty hard to believe that this was the guy I gave a lecture to when I had first met him, or that I had in fact tried to shoot him with an arrow a few times. I suppose that is what you call being young and stupid, because just a moment ago, I knew for a fact that my life had been in his claws.

Walking slowly back to dry land, I found myself sitting on the rock that Sesshomaru had vacated, wondering what to do next. Should I go back to Inuyasha. Was he still mad at me. Was I still mad at him?

When it came right down to it, there was no reason for me to stay out here. I had, like an idiot, forgot my backpack at camp, along with my bow and arrows, and I am now cold, wet, have no way to protect myself and hungry.

I could feel my face burn with embarrassment and anger, not really at Inuyasha, but at myself. Why am I always so helpless. I have been traveling to the warring states era for two years now. TWO! So why do I still make mistakes as if I had just got here. Why couldn't I be strong like Sango, or smart on my feet like Miroku?

At times, I feel more helpless than Shippo, I mean honestly, when I'm kidnapped and he's with me, he is usually more helpful getting me out of the situation than I am. Sure he's a demon but dang it he's still a kid. While I, a 17 year old teenager, couldn't seem to find herself out of a paper bag without getting lost or kidnapped or as today proved, in mortal danger.

Didn't I have these oh so great priestess powers that were supposed to be useful in situations like these? Yet I wasn't any closer to controlling them then when I first started. Sure, my archery has gotten better, and usually my powers worked just fine with the arrows, but anything else, like barriers or just blasting a demon to bits with my purity, nothing.

Was something wrong with me? Occasionally we'd run into a village miko whom I'd ask for a quick lesson from, and while I'd understand the concept that they had tried to teach me, actually doing it seemed impossible. It was always the same. Inuyasha would always just say that I didn't need to learn things that I obviously wasn't good at, and to just focus on finding the jewel shards.

All he could tell me was to continue being useless, to being the weakest link, to stay stuck in the hole I was in, and never climb out. I felt self-pity taking over again. Lately it had become the friend I turned to when I was alone. Doubt had seemed to take over my mind and soul, and I began wondering once more why I was here. Why was I brought back to this era only to break the jewel of four souls. Wouldn't it have been better if I had found the jewel in my time? Where there were no demons that would kill even just to see it.

When the jewel was complete, what was I supposed to do with it? Give it to Inuyasha? I mean, lets just face it, we wouldn't have been able to get as far as we had without him. Was he not deserving of it, he had lost the love of his life because of a cruel trick played by Naraku for the jewel, he had fought hell and back just to collect the pieces we did have.

So why did I feel like the idea of giving him the jewel would be a very bad idea. My hand brushed against my bruised cheek, a constant reminder of the violence that Inuyasha had used against me. Could I really keep using the excuse that he didn't know better, that he didn't grow up socialized so of course he didn't know how to treat people.

'He doesn't smack Sango or Miroku around or call them names,' I thought bitterly, my eyes never leaving my reflection. Who was this sad creature I was looking at? It couldn't be the same Kagome that came through the well two years ago. Where did that girl go? The one who was spunky and full of fire and would NEVER let a man treat her the way Inuyasha had. The one who knew who she was and what she stood for.

I thought of how I reacted when he hit me. It had been such a shock that I had just stood there, my face forcefully smacked to the side. Everyone at camp had gasped, Sango instantly coming to my side and standing protectively in front of me, back taunt with anger. Shippo had started screaming at Inuyasha, I could hear him crying and Miroku trying to calm the escalating situation.

I wanted so badly to look at Inuyasha, to see if he regretted his decision. If he'd say he was sorry, that it had been a mistake of blind anger, but all I could see was his ears erect and pin straight, his eyes narrow, and his body vibrating with anger. He had been yelling something but I couldn't hear anything. It felt like every thing had become background noise at that point. I had started running before I even took notice, my feet taking me as far as they could, deep into the forest we had been walking through, the sounds of my scattered thoughts that didn't make any sense filling my mind as blind panic had taken over.

To be honest, even if I wanted to go back, I had no idea where I was, where camp was, or anything in between. "Maybe when Sesshomaru was here I should have asked him for directions." I snorted, my temporary humor helping to light the situation, if only for a second.

"Lady Kagome is still here?" came a voice from behind me, jolting me out of my thoughts. Turning around, I found myself faced with Rin's bright chocolate eyes. "Rin, what are you doing here?!" I asked, my hand finding itself at my heart, the shock of her return stunning me for a moment.

"Rin thought to try and catch fish for dinner, and then Rin saw Lady Kagome hadn't left and came to check on you." she smiled sincerely, a net of two fish in the child's hand as if to help verify her story. A few yards behind her, I could see Lord Sesshomaru standing there, Jaken and Ah-Un now in tow.

"Why is Lady Kagome still here?" her tone was inquisitive, not at all accusing, and I couldn't help but smile at her curiosity.

"I don't know how to get back to camp, I guess I got lost, so I thought it would be better to stay here, then get more lost," I said as blithely as I could, as if the thought of being lost didn't scare me shitless. It actually was a pretty normal occasion for me when you really thought about it.

Rin tilted her head to the side for a moment, obviously unsure how to take my statement, before smiling brightly, her eyes lighting up once more in good cheer, and idea obviously striking the child. "Will Lady Kagome help Rin catch fish than?" She asked, tilting back in forth on the heels of her feet in barely contained glee.

Watching her reminded me of a certain mischievous fox demon, and I couldn't help the slight laugh that came out, my problems forgotten for the time being. After all, who was I to ever deny a child. Reminding myself that Rin wasn't the only one here, I looked up at Sesshomaru, my body flinching at his intense stare. Rin turned her attention to him, asking as politely as she could manage in her excited state, "Lord Sesshomaru, can Lady Kagome catch fish with Rin?"

'Leave it to the kid to handle the adult business, good job Kagome,' I thought as my cheeks reddened slightly at the humiliation of being too scared to ask myself. Sesshomaru gave me a sharp glance, his eyes lighting with a deadly warning as he gave a quick nod to the head, telling me exactly what would happen if I should step a toe out of line around Rin.

For a moment I wondered why I would put myself in this situation. Yet, when it came right down to it, I had nothing better to do, and the idea of being left alone to my own self-pity was suffocating. I was in desperate need of a distraction.

I got up from my rock, and settled for following Rin down the path next to the lake as she looked for her perfect spot to go fishing.

A little ways ahead we came to a spot where the lake turned into a small stream, allowing clear view of its inhabitants. I watched as Rin carefully observed the fish, her eyes following every movement, obviously well practiced in the verse of catching the slippery things.

In one fluid movement she caught her prey, a small grey fish that was slightly bigger than my palm. it was then placed in her little net that homed the rest of her dinner. "Your turn," she said, looking at me expectantly. 'Wow…This is going to be embarrassing' I thought, as I turned to observe the water.

Risking a look at Rin's fearsome protector, I could feel my face burning as he continued watching me. Catching dinner had never really been my strong suit. Usually Inuyasha or Sango would take care of that if we ran out of ramen. Knowing I had an audience to the show I was about to put on made me feel even more embarrassed of my lack of surviving skills.

Taking a deep breath I gently walked into the stream, once again putting my tortured feet back into its cold depths as I stared at the quick moving creatures. Eyeing a slightly bigger fish than the rest, I watched for a moment, then as quickly as I could reached for it. Not surprisingly it got away, swimming lazily to the side, as if laughing at my attempt. Annoyed, I tried again. No dice.

"Lady Kagome…you're not very good at this are you." 'Thanks Rin, I just love when people point out the obvious,' I thought sarcastically as I bit my lip to keep from saying anything stupid.

"Watch where it is going to go, and then reach for it there," Rin said, before once again catching another fish, not reaching for where it was originally, but more towards the right. Catching on, it took me five tries before I finally caught the fish I'd been eyeing.

"I got it!" I cried happily, holding it as best I could. Before I knew what was happening, the slimy wriggling thing had jumped out of my grasp and was once more back in the stream, swimming merrily away from me, never to be seen again. "Never mind," I muttered, blushing as Rin giggled next to me, obviously having a good time at my expense.

'Could this day possibly get any worse?' I inwardly moaned, eyeing the stoic demon to my right, his mocking smirk never leaving his face as he gazed at my "progress." God, I am so ready to crawl under a rock and die of embarrassment.

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Please review! :)


	3. Homeless

Thank you again everyone for reading/reviewing/favoriting/following this story. All the support has been amazing. I'm still trying to figure out what direction I want to send this story, but I don't want it to be the typical storyline of Sesshomaru instantly in love with Kagome because she smells good plot line. So if the story is not going fast enough, then I'm sorry, but its in the drama section for a reason :) I will try to update as often as I can, thankfully I have a lot of time on my hands so if I seem to be taking too long, please tell me! I really enjoy writing this, I keep wanting to write longer chapters but then what fun would that be mwahahahaha.

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, or the characters portrayed in this, only the plot!

Chapter 3: Homeless

The day continued on into the late evening, and somehow, I had been able to catch three fish after over a thousand failed attempts. Okay, maybe that was over-exaggerating just a little, but my aching back and arms felt that way.

Rin had stopped at four, catching the little buggers every time, saying that she wouldn't be able to eat anymore than that, and keeping some for breakfast wouldn't smell that great in the morning.

Looking at Sesshomaru, I knew she wasn't referring to her own sensibilities.

To be honest, it had been fun. Rin's cheerful laughter and Jaken's somewhat annoying mumbling kept the day lighthearted, and my mind thankfully preoccupied. The sting in my cheek had now turned into a dull throb that I tried my hardest to ignore.

I had offered to give the fish I'd caught to Rin, but she just laughed and told me that they were mine, and to keep them for myself.

If I thought about it, this would truly be the first time I had ever caught my own dinner.

It took hours, and lots of failed attempts, but I did it with my own two hands, my own sweat, my own will to survive. It gave me a warm feeling inside. Like maybe I wasn't 100% useless.

'Score 3 points for the girl from the future', I thought, a self satisfied smile on my face. Now to cook it. Thankfully I didn't need my supplies from the future for this feat.

"Rin, we are leaving," the demon lord stated as he stood up, his silver hair shifting ever so slightly with his fluid movements.

I looked at his back, he was already walking away as Rin gathered her dinner, her chocolate eyes shooting me a curious look.

"What about Lady Kagome?" her question causing a flinch inside me. If they left, I would be all alone.

I looked at Sesshomaru, wondering what his answer would be.

"She is of no concern," was his answer, not once stopping to give it a second thought. Obviously, there was no room for negotiation.

'I didn't want to have dinner with you anyways you jerk!' I inwardly raged, turning my attention back to the water, not wanting Rin to see my reaction, or the flush of indignation on my face.

In end it should be expected. After all, Sesshomaru only knew me as Inuyasha's companion. He had no reason to trust me or to invite me over for dinner. Who knew how long it would be before my group decided to come looking for me. If Inuyasha did come back, knowing him, he'd think Sesshomaru kidnapped me and start a fight and ask questions later.

I watched Rin's reflection as she looked between her lord and I, as if trying to come up with some idea of what to do. I couldn't be a baby about this, or cause Rin anymore trouble than I already had.

I took a deep breath to calm myself, wanting to come off as honest as possible before looking at her, a smile straining my face.

"Rin, it's okay, Inuyasha will probably be here soon. I will wait here for him. I don't want him to start an argument if he saw Lord Sesshomaru," I kept my voice light, smile firmly in place, and a gentle look in my eyes.

Hopefully she bought it. I didn't want her to worry.

Rin cocked her head to the side, trying to assess me with her eyes, nibbling indecisively at her bottom lip.

"Rin, come," was what brought her out of her reverie, causing her to instantly snap to attention.

"Bye Lady Kagome!" she called, waving lightly before following after him, her long raven hair bouncing with every step.

Jaken and Ah-Un followed after her, the imp shooting me a dark look before disappearing into the forest.

I stood there for a moment, my eyes staring at where I had last seen them, before turning attention to the food I had caught earlier.

"Okay Kagome, its getting late, lets start building a fire." This was something I could do, after all, we had been building fires and camping outside for the past two years. It was getting late, the piercing light of a waning crescent moon had appeared in the sky as it turned a darker blue, filled with oranges, pinks, and purples.

I began gathering wood from the nearby forest, deciding that staying near the river would be my best bet, as I could try and catch fish and bathe in the morning.

Trying not to think too hard, I found some decent sized rocks, and placed them into a neat circle on a dry patch of land, next adding the wood and some moss to help.

"Now all I need to do is make a fire and that'll be that," I said to myself before putting my hand in the pocket of my skirt, only to come up empty.

'My matches…I must have left them in my bag after making last nights fire.'

I could only stare at the pile of wood, my thoughts quiet. I never made a fire without matches before. If I had run out, Kilala would always be sweet enough to transform on the pile, her flames catching the wood on fire.

"Umm…I'm sure there is some flint around here somewhere right, or maybe I should rub some sticks together. Flint is like a smooth rock right?"

Twenty minutes of searching brought nil. I went with option number two, sticks. I tried rubbing them together, but all it seemed to get me were splinters. Blood had begun seeping from my hands, and tears of frustration were now welling in my eyes.

How could this be possible? I had lived here for years, and yet I couldn't make something as simple as a fire. Not once bothering to learn? Wasn't I from 500 years in the future. Shouldn't I like, be a pro at this or something.

Yet the wood remained as it was, untouched by flame, and the fish uncooked. I was starving, and suddenly the idea of eating the fish raw wasn't such a bad idea.

'Its like sashimi,' I thought, grabbing one of the fish, feeling a sick curling sensation in my stomach. If I wanted to eat the fish raw, I'd need to gut it, but I don't have a knife.

I put the fish back down, and began searching for a sharp…something to be able to cut the fish with. I got on my hands and knees, unable to see anything now that it had gotten so late, and resorted to brushing my hands against the ground.

Today just wasn't going my way, and as usual, my luck sucked. I bit my lip, trying to keep the feeling of hopelessness out of my mind. Like a bad house guest, the tears came, burning hot trails down my cheeks, and my stomach grumbled, deciding to make itself known.

I ignored it, determined to find something, anything, to make this situation bearable. A louder grumble was heard this time, yet it didn't seem to come from the vicinity from my stomach. Unless I left my stomach behind me of course.

I stopped everything I was doing, panic keeping me still. Something…was behind me.

'What now?' I thought, very, VERY slowly turning my head to look behind me. All I could see was a large creature, about the size of a very big fat horse, hidden in the dark, shuffling behind me, with what looked to be tails swishing behind it.

It was sniffing around where I'm sure I left my …pile of wood… and

'THE FISH!' I thought with dread, and could from the sounds of it, my dinner had already been discovered, and whatever it was, was helping himself.

'I better leave before he decides he wants more than an appetizer.'

As quietly as possible trying to edge toward the forest.

A stick snapped under my knee, and I heard the creature make a noise, and then bright red eyes were staring in my direction.

'Right…of course a stick would be there. Who would have thought. RUN!' my mind cried, and thats exactly what I did. I ran as fast as I could, my heart feeling like it was going to beat out of my chest, my ears drowning out noise, and suddenly everything felt far away.

The adrenaline and fear taking over my mind, and all I could do was run. I'd trip here and there, but I kept running, unsure if I had lost the beast but not taking the chance to look behind me.

Tripping for what must have been the twentieth time over a large tree root, I felt a sharp, hot pain in my stomach as a jagged rock ripped the tender flesh, and I curled into a ball, trying hard not to scream, to give away my position, though I'm sure the blood already did.

Crawling as best I could, I noticed that the uplifted roots made a sort of cage, as the tree had become uprooted halfway, providing a slight barrier to the world.

Tears were never ending, and like a pathetic creature, I snuck under the roots, and laid against the ground, trying hard to stop my tear wrenched hiccups and ignored how my abdomen had a hot wet feeling trickling out of it.

I hid my face in my arms, feeling every shudder that went through me, and curled even tighter into myself, listening as best as I could on what was going on around me.

The night had gone quiet, and other than the sound of cicadas singing into the night, and the wind, I heard nothing.

After a while, I calmed down and finally looked up. Big red eyes were staring back at me.

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Sorry this chapter was a little shorter than I wanted it to be, but I liked the idea of stopping here, so please bear with me. Knowing me, I won't be able to contain myself and will have the next update up in two or three days, so please stay tuned and remember...

Please review :)


	4. His reason

Hi everyone! Thank you for your awesome reviews and for adding me to your favorites/following list. I get excited every time I see the numbers go up. Sorry how I left the other chapter, I'm sure everyone was hoping Kagome would start traveling with Sesshomaru, but I wanted this to be a little bit more original then the usual storyline. Please be patient.  
There will be awesome KagomexSesshomaru goodness eventually, but right now Kagome just (obviously) is not in the mood lol. Please let me know if you have any ideas for this fic, as I am making it up as I go. Thank you again!

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or the characters portrayed in this fanfiction. However the plot is 100% mine!

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**Chapter 4: His Reason**

I think my lungs forgot how to breathe. It usually isn't this hard right. Yet, at this moment, it felt like all the oxygen I had inhaled turned into this giant ball that had lodged itself into my throat, stopping the scream that I could feel creeping its way up my throat as I stared into those blood red orbs with only single black slits for pupils.

This was it. This was the moment I, Kagome Higurashi, died a horrible gruesome death involving me possibly being eaten a live, watching as this creature ate my innards. I wonder if the others would find me and bring my mangled body back to mama so she could have something to bury and grieve to.

Okay maybe thats a little over the top but honestly thats what I thought for a split second until the creature came a little closer and I could finally make out its shape and its familiar aura eased into my awareness.

"K-Kilala?" I called, unsure if that was who I was really seeing at the moment. Kilala made a happy purring noise, and I kid you not, I thought my heart would stop from the shock of it all.

"KILALA!" I cried, diving out of my not so helpful hiding place to hug the giant cat, her soft fur a luxury I thought I'd never feel again.

A soft huff was heard before she began nuzzling my neck, her body vibrating with contented purrs. I couldn't seem to find the energy to let her go.

Out of all the creatures in the world, I never suspected for a moment it could be Kilala who had approached me at the river.

"You ate my dinner you pig," I mock scolded her as I tried to wipe my tears away with her velvety fur, probably covering it in snot and god knows what else.

I probably should let go before she decides eating me might save her fur.

As gently as I could I pulled away, putting a single kiss to her nose and a tender scratch behind her right ear.

"You have no idea how happy I am to see you," I mumbled, giving her a weary smile.

She made a sad noise, and lightly licked my stomach, which was still bleeding, though not as bad as before.

"We should get back to the others. They are probably worried about us."

She knelt down onto her stomach, which was greatly appreciated as I delicately climbed up her back, nursing my stomach wound as best as I could.

Curiously enough, Kilala didn't get up right away, instead staring up into the distance where a pair of golden eyes and silver hair could be seen from the light of the moon.

Sesshomaru looked regal as he stood on a high branch, his aristocratic features looking even more piercing under the graceful touch of the brilliant crescent in the night sky.

The fire cat gave him a nod and a purring roar, in which the demon lord only returned with a slight nod, before turning away and disappearing into the night.

Had Sesshomaru…led Kilala to me? It sounded crazy, I mean, there was just no way, but as I continued staring at the spot he had been last seen, and recalled Kilala's ambient reaction to him, which was by all means a complete 180 to how the members of my group usually acted towards the demon, there was just no other way to explain it.

"Lets go home girl," I whispered, deciding that I had enough adventure for one night, and wanted nothing more than to crawl out of my wet bloody clothes into a nice fluffy pair of pajamas and possibly warm up by the fire surrounded by my friends.

I put Inuyasha's reaction earlier to the back of my mind, deciding that if he did anything stupid, I'd sit him until I felt satisfied.

Nodding at this thought, I laid down against Kilala's warm fur, feeling guilty for ruining it with blood before nodding off into a defeated sleep as the demon cat ascended to the sky.

When I awoke, it was to Sango's strong arms wrapping around me, helping me off her feline companion.

I heard her worried tone, but for the life of me I couldn't make out the words. I felt as Miroku took me from her, carrying me as carefully as he could, before lying me down next to a warm roaring fire, its dance as captivating as its heat.

I instantly curled into myself when I was place on the ground, my body nothing more than a quivering mess, and I could feel a fever rush through me, probably from being in wet clothes all day and then getting cuts all over.

"Kagome it's okay. You are safe. Lets get you out of these wet clothes," I heard Sango whisper in my ear, her hands lightly running through my tangled hair, trying her best to coax me out of my shell.

I nodded, or at least I think I did, before slowly sitting up. Miroku came up with a pair of my pajamas and my first aid kit, already prepared to assist me when Sango gave him a dark look and a shooing motion.

I couldn't help but chuckle at his wounded expression, as if his intent to dress me and clean my stomach was from his innocent intentions. Some things never change I guess.

"Kagome are you okay," Shippo asked, his big tearful green eyes staring up at me as he wrung his little hands together, nervous energy causing his tail to shake and his aura to give off a jittery feeling that I couldn't help but want to soothe.

"I'm okay Shippo, just…tired." I replied as I looked down at myself, finally taking in my appearance.

I was filthy, that was the only way to describe it. My feet were covered in cuts, mud and what looked like blood. I hadn't realized until this moment that I had left my shoes and socks at the riverside.

Dirt covered my legs in mixtures of brown and black. My school girl uniform was a goner, finally biting the dust as it was now torn everywhere and caked with blood and dirt.

After two years here you'd think I'd be done trying to salvage this thing. Why I even kept wearing it was a true mystery. I mean, yeah I did get pushed back a year in school due to my constant absences, but really, what was the point of wearing it?

Putting my thoughts aside, I began the strenuous task of undressing, making a face as I put on my clean pjs on my dirt covered body. Seriously in need of a bath pronto stat.

Sango already had water boiling over the fire in the pot I usually used to cook dinner in, knowing I'd pitch a fit about infection if she tried to clean my stomach with anything less than sanitary. I could already feel my head spinning, and like a godsend, my friend was there, her calloused hands helping me onto my sleeping bag someone had rolled out for me, and I was asleep before my head hit the fabric.

When I awoke, it looked to be late morning. A cool towel was on my forehead, the feeling soothing while the rest of my body thrummed in pain and my eyes felt like they were burning inside my scalp from the bright light.

"Ugh," was all I could get out, before rolling over, trying to get away from the god awful light. Bad decision apparently since my left side decided to flare white hot pain up my body. I whimpered, curling into a ball, trying to ignore the pain.

"Don't do that stupid, its gonna make it worse," came a rough voice, clawed hands gently grabbing me and rolled me onto my back.

'Inuyasha,' I thought, my body instantly relaxing, knowing that if Inuyasha was here, everything was okay. For a moment it felt like any other day, that every thing was fine, and that I didn't just have the worst day of my life the day before.

But like a boomerang, all my memories came back, its force snapping my eyes open. Inuyasha wasn't safe, rang through my mind and I curled away from him, his once comforting warmth only bringing cold dread in its place.

As I looked into his eyes, I saw a small spark of hurt cross through them, before he turned away, his ears pinned back and his arms crossed protectively against himself.

"Feh," was all he said, before walking across the camp and jumping into what must have been the tree he had claimed for the night.

In all honesty, Inuyasha had been the last thing on my mind last night. His crappy attitude and even crappier way of dealing with things (slapping me) had been pushed to the back burner when it came to fighting (running) for my life and almost being eaten (by Kilala).

Yeah, yesterday definitely hadn't been my favorite day of the year.

Apparently it hadn't been anybody else's either as I looked at our ragtag group. Sango's hair was all over the place, and her expression was hard as she put out the fire from the night before. Miroku, though ever calm, also looked wary, a pouting Shippo conquering his right shoulder.

Finally Sango looked my way, a relieved look momentarily taking over her face as she noticed me looking at her.

"I see your fever finally broke," she said before making her way next to my sleeping bag, her cool hand pressing against my forehead for a few moments. Making a satisfied noise, she finally looked into my eyes, and I could see my friend hadn't rested well the night before, as dark bags had made its appearance under her tired brown eyes.

"Were you up all night," I asked, my voice croaking from my dry and scratchy throat. She gave a weary sigh which I took as a yes, before she walked over and brought back one of my water bottles.

I took the water gratefully, and carefully gulped it down. It helped, but just slightly. Deciding to get the worst over with, I slightly lifted my shirt and took at the gash on my stomach. It wasn't that bad, maybe four inches, but it would definitely scar. It looked like Sango had applied stitches. Three of them.

"What happened," I finally asked, trying to ignore how the atmosphere seemed to become tense at the question.

The demon slayer sighed before handing me a stick of fish. My stomach growled at the sight, the hunger I felt the night before making itself known as I snatched it and began devouring. It was thankfully cooked and still slightly warm.

"We thought you would come back after you cooled off. But then it became night time and we got worried. I sent Kilala to go look for you and you came back as if you went through hell and back." It went unspoken that Inuyasha had NOT gone looking for me.

The knowledge hurt. For all he knew, I could have been in mortal danger or getting kidnapped. Yet, he was so angry that he didn't even bother.

Last night however had been an eye opener. I couldn't even last one night alone here. I had always relied on my friends to do everything for me. I was pathetic and it has come time for me to get over this spoiled brat attitude.

The fact that my enemy had to lead Kilala to me to help me back to my friends was mortifying. He must have laughed when he saw me run away from Kilala, completely terrified out of my mind to even realize she was one of my friends.

I felt my face burn in humiliation. If I had stopped for a second I would have been able to sense Kilala's aura a lot sooner.

I stared at the stick in my hand, noticing all that was left on it were tiny fish bones.

The next time I saw Sesshomaru I would show him I wasn't a weak little girl. That I wouldn't cry at everything that went bump in the night.

I eyed Inuyasha, wondering where we stood now.

We had been friends, sometimes more, for two years, but yesterday everything had changed.

When I thought about it, I guess it wasn't surprising. For the last couple months Inuyasha had become more confrontational. Practically to the point of cursing at me every couple of minutes.

It had been wearing me down lately and yesterday something in him seemed to have snapped. Was it because of my own uselessness. Was Inuyasha tired of me constantly relying on him? It was a hard pill to swallow, but I knew that had to partially be true.

I mean other than detect shards, which he have found in over a month, cook meals, which I could no longer provide due to family financial issues, and take care of Shippo what else did I do for our group?

Inuyasha protected everyone, barely slept, and even hunts for food if we ever ran out of it. Sango and Miroku could both assist Inuyasha in slaying demons, and for the most part never found themselves in trouble. Shippo could even get us out of a bind with his fox magic.

Yet Kagome, poor little Kagome, was useless without her bow and arrows. Had a tendency of getting kidnapped on a regular basis and more than once has lost the shikon jewel shards to Naraku's evil grasp.

I have to get stronger. Somehow. Someway. We can't keep going like this. Something needs to change. Now.

I looked up at our silver haired leader. He was staring off into the distance, back straight, ears tensed. I had always had to apologize for any fight we ever had. I could feel myself getting ready to again, but in the end, would that make things better or worse?

Was it really okay for me to apologize for this. To apologize for making him so mad that he had to hit me? No. No way in hell. Where I come from, hitting anybody isn't right, especially a woman. Sure, we aren't in my time right now, but I'd be doing myself an injustice to just sit here and take it.

I needed to draw the line. It needed to be drawn now.

"Inuyasha, can I talk to you." His ears focused in my direction but otherwise gave no sign of moving. Sango, who was still at my side, tensed, and gave him a dark look. I could tell she wasn't thrilled at what had transpired yesterday, but was holding in her two cents.

"Its okay guys, just give us a moment," I said, trying to give them a reassuring smile. The gang eyed me suspiciously but shuffled out of the clearing, probably to go hide behind a bush and listen downwind. Eavesdroppers.

"I'm listening," Inuyasha said gruffly from his perch, glancing at me for a moment before looking away.

I took a deep breath, wanting nothing more than to sit his stubborn butt out of that tree so we could talk eye to eye but violence shouldn't be the answer in this situation…but it would still be there if I needed it.

"If you think I'm going to apologize for yesterday you are out of your mind," I wasn't going to beat around the bush no matter how angry he was. Inuyasha snarled, finally facing me full on, his eyes burning with rage.

"I won't ask you to apologize either." at this his snarl diminished, but his eyes did not leave mine. I had his attention. I sighed again.

"Inuyasha, you are my friend. You always have been, but I will not tolerate this anymore. I am not your enemy nor your punching bag. I am your friend. So if you ever think of slapping me, calling me by anything other than my name, or doing something equally as wrong, then we are done."

I wasn't pulling punches this time. My voice was firm, my body proud and I felt like my old self again, if only for a moment. I needed to get this out, I needed to fix this before it got too out of hand. Before the Inuyasha I had known for the past two years disappeared into someone else.

"I don't know how it got this way. You yell at me all the time, you slap me for something small like ramen, and then you leave me out in the woods to die. If Kilala hadn't come to get me, I'm sure I would have been. What do I need to do Inuyasha? What do I need to do to get my friend back." My eyes had teared up, but I stubbornly raised my chin, willing them not to go away, even as my lips trembled.

Finally, Inuyasha's anger toned down, and as he released a sigh, he pinned his ears back, a sure fire way of telling me he felt bad. He jumped down from his perch and stood before me, his right hand lightly brushing away the tears from my left eye, and then gently cupping the cheek he had bruised the day before.

"I didn't mean to," he finally said, his voice low and earnest. I gave him a watery smile, knowing that was as close to an apology as I was gonna get.

"I don't know when things got like this Kagome, I don't know why I'm taking them out on you," he stopped for a second, his eyes searching mine, and I willed my own to tell him to continue.

"Things have been hard lately, the jewel shards, Naraku…Kikyo," he could barely whisper the last part, and I tried hard not to choke on my tears just from the sound of her name.

"I know its not an excuse for hitting you, or always getting mad at you, and I don't mean to do them, its just sometimes I feel like…like," and he stopped again, unsure of how to continue.

"Like what?" I asked gently, trying to coax it out of him. He looked away, and if possible, his ears pinned back more. I could feel dread coiling in my gut.

"Like your not trying," he finally said softly, the guilt in his eyes making it even more real.

The world stopped. I'm sure of it. In fact I'm pretty sure time stopped along with it, along with my heart, because all I could hear was the sound of it breaking.

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Poor Kagome. Things just aren't going her way. But as they say, sometimes things have to get worse before they get better. Don't worry, Kagome won't be a cry baby forever. I just want to make a very obvious progression in her character in the later chapters. For now just put up with her nonsense. Thank you for reading and ...

please review :)


	5. To Stand Up or Back Down

Hi everyone! I'm sorry it took me so long to update. I just got a new job at Petsmart, so I've spent most of the past week training. Still working out the kinks in this story, but I promise it will start speeding up soon. Please let me know your thoughts :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or the characters portrayed in this fanfiction. However, the plot is 100% mine!

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**Chapter 5: To Stand Up or Back Down**

Adrenaline is a funny thing. Sometimes it can give you courage to do things you could never imagine. Like fighting a dragon or a deranged psycho spider. In my case, it was fighting my best friend.

The person who had stood by my side every time I stumbled or messed up. When I came upon trouble, he would be there without fear. My dog eared, bad mouthed, white knight.

Those times seemed to have come and gone though.

Without my noticing, we'd been distancing ourselves from each other. Starting to forget the important things. Like how to make the other smile. How to lift each other up when we were down.

It suddenly felt like my whole body had been dumped in an icy river. My head felt cloudy, my ears had an almost painful pressure in them, as if I had been dropped off onto the tip of the highest mountain where the elevation could press down on my senses.

My hands were shaking, and clenching them seemed to only make the trembling worse.

'Not trying? I'm not trying?'

The past two years flashed in front of my eyes. Our battles. Our failures. Our victories. The times when all had appeared lost and I had been there, tipping the scales back into our favor with a single arrow.

I thought about the life I had given up. How my friends from my era had slowly stopped visiting when I'd come home. When I had finally come upon a chance to take my tests that could decide my future and I hadn't even been able to answer the first question because I was too busy trying to save the world to even have time to study.

How my mama's eyes would darken with worry and fear every time I packed my bag to return to the past, away from her warm embrace and safety that only a mother could provide.

How I missed Souta's first day of middle school. Of his first heartbreak. I noticed months ago how he no longer asked me of my adventures because they only made him nervous. Only made him wonder if his sister would ever come back.

My grandfather was getting older every day, any day now he could be gone, but instead of spending time with him, I was here, not knowing if he'd still be at that house, waiting for me with another story when I got home.

I bit my lip as hard as I could, and could taste the sharp copper flavor as it pooled into my mouth.

"I'm not trying?" I asked, my voice low, carrying on a calm tone that I did not feel. If possible, Inuyasha's ears pinned back even further, no longer visible against his white mane of hair.

"Risking my life isn't trying? Never seeing my family isn't trying? Being out here sleeping on the cold hard ground barely having enough to eat every day instead of my nice warm bed and mother's cooking isn't trying?!" My voice was slowly gaining strength, though it felt like the rest of me was trying to curl up and die.

"Inuyasha, I have given up everything for you! My family. My friends. I'm sorry I'm not Kikyo," he opened his mouth as if to stop me but I help my hand up, stopping whatever he was going to say.

"I'm sorry I don't have demon strength, or haven't been training all my life to protect the world. I never asked for the Shikon jewel. I never meant to break it. I never wanted to be here in the first place, but it doesn't matter. I still get up every morning. I fight every day. I put up with you which is way more bullshit than anyone should have to deal with but I do."

I could feel heat creeping up my neck, probably turning my face a hideous shade of red but I couldn't stop.

"Do you realize when this is over I'll have nothing. NOTHING! I couldn't keep up in school. I have no friends left there. Even my family is moving on without me. Do you even care?"

By now he was looking down, his shoulders slumped, but it just wasn't enough. I could feel despair take over my very being.

I could feel the shadow of self pity and doubt taking over me. The loneliness draped me like a thick blanket, bringing with it a cold that no amount of cloth could keep away.

"When we started this, I promised I would help you find the jewel shards. You promised you would protect me until this journey was over. Well you know what. Its not over. Yet you are turning your back on me and that promise. You left me alone for hours. Did you know who found me?"

No movement. Not even a twitch of the ear. I could no longer see his eyes. His hair keeping them hidden from my gaze.

"YOUR BROTHER!" I screamed, needing a reaction. Wanting him to do something. Anything.

That got his attention. His neck made a snapping sound as he looked up at me, his eyes wide with golden fire.

"What," he growled, his eyes narrowing.

"Yeah, thats right. While you were having your stupid childish tantrum, Sesshomaru found me." He snarled at me, disbelief written all over his face. I knew I was trailing away from the point, but all I could think of was hurting him. The way he made me hurt.

"We spent hours together, he even helped me get dinner," okay that was like completely untrue but he didn't need to know that. All I could feel now was the cold satisfaction of his anger.

"Are you serious?!" He finally howled, blood dripping from his hands as his claws dug into them. Call me crazy, but instead of making this situation better, I think I made it worse. Betrayal flashed through his eyes, barely noticeable behind the hurt and anger.

Cold filled my veins. What had I done? Had I finally crossed the line. Were we too far gone? Had I put the icing on the cake before waiting for it to cool down.

I could feel our friendship melting away.

Unbidden the tears filled my eyes, making my voice watery and words unintelligible.

"Not really. Rin did. But if he hadn't been there I'm sure I would have died."

"Enough," was all he said before turning around. His back was straight, his red haori waving angrily with the breeze.

"If you hate this place so much then go home. You haven't been much help anyways. If you are so worried about your 'future' then go back and forget this place. You never belonged anyways."

He was already walking away before I could retort. Whatever was left of our friendship was gone.

My knees gave out. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. This wasn't how it was supposed to end. Yet as I stared as his slowly disappearing figure, I knew that things were bad. That with my own hands, I had ruined everything.

Time seemed to come and go. Before I knew it, the day had turned into shadows, and the cool night breeze filled me. Our group was falling apart. Instead of being the one to hold it together, I was the one causing it to break.

For hours Sango had tried to console me, but I couldn't hear her over the roaring in my ears, or the loud silence that had taken residence in my heart. Things couldn't go back to the way they were.

It hadn't been the ramen that had angered Inuyasha. It had been me. Once again, not pulling my weight. Bringing on more baggage for our group to carry instead of figuring out a solution that didn't involve causing our already tired friends to find another way to survive.

A part of me raged. I was only a seventeen year old 21st century school girl.

How could he expect me to be anything but? I should be going to school, laughing with friends, not trying to find a cursed jewel and stop some power hungry, love-scorned, baboon pelt wearing freak.

Yet I was here. Fate had decided that my destiny was here, in the warring states era. That I should release Inuyasha from his eternal sleep and help destroy the evil lurking these lands.

I had failed. The thought kept ringing in my mind.

Instead of getting stronger, I had somehow stayed the same helpless Kagome.

Every day I saw my friends getting stronger. Simple humans like Sango and Miroku were pushed passed their limits as they fought for the things they believed in.

What did I have to believe in anymore? I hadn't lost anyone like Sango or Shippo had. I didn't have a curse lingering over my head, possible death taunting my every thought like Miroku. I hadn't spent my life hating my very existence like Inuyasha.

No. I was just Kagome. The girl from the future. The girl who ruined so many lives by breaking the Sacred Jewel into a million pieces. Who was an almost perfect reflection of Inuyasha's past love, Kikyo.

For the first time in a long time, I felt lost. Confused. Wondering what I was doing here. If you thought about it, Naraku probably had the rest of the shards.

Would I truly be any help in the final battle. Or would I just get in the way?

I couldn't even survive one day by myself. Always assured that Inuyasha would come for me. But this time, he hadn't. The time for playing the damsel in distress was over. Which left me with a choice.

Would I get up and fight? Or would I stand down and go home.

I looked at the small bottle hanging from my neck, its contents sparkling, still pure despite my dark thoughts. Possibly because of the container that held them, protecting them from my insecurities.

Things had to change, and it wouldn't happen unless I got up. Finally my thoughts quieted. My heart began to beat again, the feeling weak but nonetheless there.

I stood up.

"Sango, Miroku, Shippo, Kilala," I called, my voice firm with decision, my back straight despite everything.

My friends stopped what they were doing and looked at me. These were the people who had suffered more than anyone I had ever known.

Sango had been the sister I never had, someone who I could confess my deepest secrets. Who had lost everything, yet stood proudly, with purpose, defying even death to bring justice to her family.

Miroku, a lecherous monk that had wormed his way into my heart, had taken on the role of my older brother. Who had known from the day he was born that his fate was entwined with the wind tunnel in his hand, yet it did not stop him from being kind. To being self-less and listening and helping those that needed him.

Shippo was practically a son to me. Losing his family hadn't stopped him from enjoying life. From giving me hugs when a fight with Inuyasha hadn't gone that well. Or from drawing pictures to brighten my day. He was my light when things were dark.

Kilala, even though she couldn't use words, she protected all of us as if we were her own. Her comforting presence always there when you needed her.

These were my friends. They were my reason I was here, still fighting with every fiber in my body. They were my strength that lifted me up no matter how far I had fallen. When I was home, they were the people I thought about. Worried about. Trusted more than any one.

They weren't people to make the day a little more bearable. They were my family. My future. The people that I would lay my life down for. Even if this ended terribly, I'd still have them. I'd still have my own family in my era, who supported me the best they could, even if they weren't here with me.

I gave them a small, reassuring smile.

"Things are different now." I stopped to take a deep breath, watching as they all nodded at me.

"I'm not leaving. I'm not going to give up. If I haven't tried enough then I will try harder," they tried to stop me, tried to tell me that what Inuyasha had said wasn't true but I wouldn't listen, because in a way it was.

Sure, my priestess powers had improved slightly, but I was still clinging to a part of myself that wasn't there anymore. Clinging to a school girl uniform and ideals that represented something that I wasn't anymore.

"I want to be stronger. I want to bring something more to this team. I can't hide behind you guys anymore. If we are going to defeat Naraku, then we must all be strong. I won't hold you guys back anymore."

Shippo ran to me, his small arms wrapping around my neck as he jumped as high as he could to reach me.

"I'll get stronger too. I won't let Inuyasha talk to you like that anymore," he cried, his tears soaking into my shirt. I smiled and held him as close as I could, murmuring a thank you that only he could hear. I could tell what happened earlier had been hard on him.

Miroku's eyes shone with calm understanding and he nodded, staying quiet, yet his gaze said a thousand words.

Sango's body shook and she gave me a watery smile. I could tell this day had been hard for her. I knew she always thought of me as her little sister. That forcing me to learn how to fight wasn't something she wanted to do.

I could tell as she looked at me she thought of her own little brother, how his sweet disposition had changed when thrown into a world of bloodshed and carnage. For having to do things he didn't want.

"You don't have to do this," she whispered, her hand, calloused and firm, taking mine, sisterly affection coming off of her in waves.

"Yes I do," I said, and just like that she understood. Kilala, who had been taking shelter on Sango's shoulder, jumped to mine, her purrs telling me that she was happy with my decision.

Happy that I would stay.

That night I threw away my lighter and matches. I dug through my bag and decided on what was worth keeping. No longer would I take the easy way out. It was time to learn how to survive in this era. It was time to start trying again.

My first fire took over an hour to start. My hands had even more sores on them, blood made them sting worse, and I had probably a thousand splinters to pick out, but the fire I had made was warm, and it provided a soft gentle light in the quiet night for my friends and I.

I had only sticks and moss to work with, as flint was not easily found in the area we had been camping out at.

Inuyasha had not returned. In all honesty, I wasn't sure if he would.

Unable to work out in my pajamas, and it being late at night as it was, we decided I would start my training tomorrow. I wouldn't get stronger just wishing for it. T

he pace Inuyasha usually had us on never really gave us time to focus on training. Which might have to due with why I never got any stronger.

Stopping only to fight for our lives really shouldn't count as training.

Sango had offered to train me in the arts of defending myself. Until I could do that, offense was out of the question.

Miroku would be teaching me sutras and meditation.

It was a start. No one knew if Inuyasha would be back. On the rare chances he did take off by himself, he'd usually be gone for days, probably off with Kikyo. Due to that, we'd have to take turns standing guard through the night.

I tried not to let those thoughts bother me, instead focusing on putting ointments on my damaged hands, then letting Sango gently bind them.

The wound on my stomach still ached, moving to much would probably stretch out the stitches but what could I do. Hopefully some rest would do my wounds some good.

I woke up early, the sun had yet to touch the world with its soothing light. We didn't have food, and I had made a promise to myself that I would be useful.

Regretfully, I woke Kilala, asking if she would mind taking me to the river. Miroku was still awake, as he had been the last watch of the morning.

"Would you like us to come with you Lady Kagome?" he asked, his tone gentle.

I shook my head. Kilala would be with me. If trouble happened she could bring me back to safety.

"I'll be fine. I know where I'm going." He nodded. I think he could tell I was trying to gain my independence back, even if Kilala was with me.

The fire cat and I walked off to the tree line, where she transformed, taking us to the skies, glowing a brilliant orange light that shone beautifully in gray dawn of morning.

Ten or so minutes passed by quietly, which I spent trying to silence my thoughts. Things like 'Would this work?' or 'Will Inuyasha come back this time?' kept crossing my mind. I kept messing with my book bag straps, trying to distract myself from my own self doubt.

When had my confidence taken such a large plummet? I didn't use to think this way. Or at least I don't think I did. Guess I'll have to work on that.

Kilala's growls were comforting, I could feel them vibrating up my legs, through my whole body. The best I could, I opened up my senses, feeling her fiery aura, how it felt almost mothering in a protective sort of way. She usually only felt this way when she was comforting Shippo.

I smiled to myself, enjoying how the presence felt against my senses.

Another aura, huge and powerful suddenly crossed my senses, and I grabbed more fur then necessary as fear fought its way through my system.

Again, Kilala growled, still comforting and protective. Apparently, whoever the aura belonged to, it didn't bother her.

Looking down, I saw a silver haired figure through the trees, his calculating gold eyes focused on my blue ones.

Sesshomaru was waiting by the river, and by the looks of it, he wasn't going anywhere.

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Wow that took me a little bit to write. A little longer than I had planned but I wanted everyone to know that Sesshomaru has NOT been forgotten. He will be a main character soon, just not right now. I want everyone to know that I don't think of Kagome as weak at all. In fact she is my favorite character of any series, but to get her to be with Sesshomaru, there had to be a major change in dynamics with her group, i.e. Inuyasha. Please don't get me wrong, Inuyasha isn't bad, but he is a jerk sometimes so if I make him out to be the bad guy, it is because right now they need to figure some things out. Thank you for reading and remember...

PLEASE REVIEW! :)


	6. Fishing in the Dark

Hi everyone! Sorry for the late update. I've been working at petsmart and now have my own dogsitting business (which somehow has been thriving, thanks !) so its been pretty busy. I tried to add a little of my own humor and personality into this chapter, to show that Kagome is slowly getting herself back, now that Inuyasha, who has been the dark shadow in her mind lately, is gone. Gotta say I'm pretty proud of this chapter, but will try my best to keep Sesshomaru slightly more in character! Hope you like it and thank you for all the awesome reviews/faves/and added alerts!

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or the characters portrayed in this story!

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**Chapter 6: Fishing in the Dark**

They say men are called handsome or rugged and for the most part I would agree. When I thought of Inuyasha, he was both of those things, if he'd only keep his mouth shut. Miroku and Koga could also be thought of as handsome or good looking.

Yet as I stared into ice cold golden eyes, all I could think is that he was beautiful.

Don't get me wrong, he definitely had the 'I could kill you in my sleep and not leave a trace of you left' kind of aura going, but that did not seem to stop my trail of thought.

'Perhaps Inuyasha hit me harder than I thought,' the idea seemed very plausible at the moment.

Sesshomaru was definitely not on my friendly ally list, even if he had (?) helped Kilala find me the night before.

Somehow though, I couldn't help all that bad. After all, he seemed to care for Rin, even if it could only be considered curiosity.

As we got closer to him, even with all his beauty, I couldn't stop the rush of fear that seemed to crawl through my skin from his powerful aura. No matter how good looking he was, there was no way i'd want to touch him, even if it was with a twenty foot pole.

I'm sure I'd be dead before I found one anyways…

Kilala seemed to have her own itinerary in mind however, and without my consent, she landed next to the the demon that was currently causing my brain to melt down. Maybe if that shuts down first, him killing me will come quick and painless.

For a split moment, I found it hilarious how I had spent practically all of yesterday evening with him, if being in the same clearing as him and breathing the same air counted, and I had barely given my possible death by his hands a passing thought.

Where was Rin when you needed her?

Kilala came to a tentative stop a good ten feet away from his, a soft growl of greeting was made but nothing more. I guess I'm supposed to say something right? But what? All I could do was stare. Funny enough he stared right back.

Glad we are on the same page here.

I could feel Kilala shifting under me, obviously telling me the joy ride was over.

What was I doing? Oh yeah, I'm supposed to be getting breakfast.

Purpose filled my veins like a spark of fire, and just like that the fear was temporarily pushed back to a respected place deep inside and my will was once more under control, as if it hadn't left.

If he wanted to kill me, he would have done it already. Right?

"Good morning Lord Sesshomaru." I stated as I slid off the fire cat's back, apprehensively bowing at the Lord of the Western Lands. For a few moments I refused to look up at him, nervous that it would offend him, yet as the silence continued I couldn't help myself.

As my eyes, as secretly as possible, slowly rose to look at him, he finally moved, turning away so his back faced me, showing me that I was of no importance to him, and to remove myself from his sight before he changed his mind on the not killing me thing.

I knew a silent dismissal when I saw one, and with a straight back I stood straight, and began making my way to the river not to far from where I stood.

Kilala shifted back to her smaller form and hopped up onto my book bag, obviously ready for a much needed cat nap.

The idea caused a burn of envy in me, but I ignored it. My group would be hungry soon, and I wanted to pull my own weight, even if it was something as simple as breakfast.

It took me exactly 3 seconds to realize that this would be no simple task. It was still pretty dark out, as the sun had yet to rise, and the stream I was supposed to be catching our breakfast in was completely black.

I stared at it for a second in disbelief, wondering how bad my foresight could really be.

How was I suppose to fish?

Call me crazy, but I could swear that dog demon was snickering at me. A quick glance behind me was all I needed to know that he was indeed behind me, and though I couldn't see his smirk, I was 100% sure it was there.

I felt a flush of embarrassment. Was I really going to make an ass of myself in front of him again? The previous nights mortification of being seen terrified of my own feline companion crept its way into my mind.

No way in hell!

There has got to be a way to do this without him laughing at me, even if he isn't actually doing so, because I'm positive he is, just on the inside.

Kilala's tails wrapped around me comfortingly, the soft warm fur keeping away the chill of the morning. Note to self, invest in a scarf.

I knelt next to the water, squinting my eyes, but only just barely making out shadows, of which I wasn't even sure if they were fish or just ripples passing me by.

Obviously seeing them would be a problem, and the sun probably wasn't due up for another ten minutes.

Another minute of his insufferable smugness would surely kill me.

'Come on Kagome. You are from 500 years from the future. Surely that should give you some advantage as to think outside the box right?'

I heard a splash next to me, and the faintest glimmer of sea flesh. Focusing on that spot, I saw it happen again.

Shuffling over towards that direction, shadowy figures which I identified to be rocks could be seen jutting out of stream, causing fish to jump over it in an attempt to continue their path.

I bit my lip in thought. Even with the advantage of the rocks, I'm positive I still wouldn't be able to catch the slippery creatures. If only I had something to catch them with.

Just like that, an imaginary light bulb, which by the way hadn't even been invented yet, appeared in my mind. Struck with inspiration I ripped my bag off my shoulders, Kilala giving off an irritated mewl at me for disrupting her sleep.

Somehow I don't think I'll have a warm fire feline demon warming my neck anytime soon.

Impatiently I started pawing through my bag, trying to find what I was looking for with touch alone.

"Aha!" I shouted, pulling out Shippo's bug catching net, its wooden handle easily fitting in my hand. I had gotten it for him a few months ago, and didn't even consider disposing of it with my earlier things, as it was a present for the fox child after all.

The netting was pretty strong, and none of the holes were especially large. It could work. A few minutes of trying to catch the fish in the air with the net proved fruitless, as the fish jumped right back out, or I missed exactly where they were jumping to.

Pouting, I continued to think.

I knew I was on to something. In the future, large nets were used to catch mass amounts of fish. Obviously swatting it around in hopes of catching something wasn't going to work.

Fingering the fine threads, a new idea hit me. Moving to the other side of the rocks, where the fish seem to be swimming towards prior to jumping over it, I place the net into the water and held it there.

For a moment there was nothing, but with a bit of patience, something finally swam into it, and I felt the telltale tug against the net.

With my free hand, I twisted the net so my catch wouldn't get free, and I then pulled out breakfast.

For a moment, all I could do was stare at the shadowy figure in my clever web, its struggling noticeable even with my practically useless sight.

I don't think I've smiled this wide in a long time. Without any guidance from anyone, I had caught the fish with my own wit. Giddily, I looked behind me, wondering if he had notice.

His stare caught me off guard. The first light of dawn lightly brushed his face, and I could see his uplifted eyebrow without trouble.

Apparently my solution had caught him off guard.

I could feel a light blush formed on my face. It felt like a lifetime ago when I had last been the cause of that look on his face. I'm pretty positive that it was during all his attempts to kill me.

I should probably run for my life.

Not much caught Sesshomaru, ruler of the West of guard after all.

For a moment we just stared at each other.

"Priestess, what is that?" He finally asked, his fine silver eyebrow still cocked in question as he continued to watch as my prey struggled in vain for release from the strange contraption in my grasp.

Without thinking, a reply rolled off my tongue.

"A bug catcher net," I answered, my voice trailing off towards the end.

Do people even have bug catcher nets in the feudal era? I mean, how often do people really fall into silly past times here anyway.

His disbelieving look told me exactly what he thought of my retort.

"Do you expect this Sesshomaru to believe that you spend your day catching bugs with that … net?" His sarcasm was just killing me.

Indignant, I put my hands on my hips, or at least the best I could with a crazy fish desperately shaking the net in hopes for freedom. Yeah fish, don't think your going anywhere except my stomach.

"I don't catch bugs," I cried defensively, my face heating up.

I could tell he was getting bored with my theatrics. Perhaps I should explain before he decides killing me would be more helpful in curing his confusion.

"Its for Shippo, the fox demon in our group. He likes to collect them for tricks." I told him, trying my best to look affronted that he would accuse me of such a ridiculous thing.

Me? Collecting bugs? Ha!

From his hard glare, I could tell he either REALLY wanted to roll his eyes or just walk away. Ignoring him, which by the way was a very stupid to do but I'll blame my idiocy on hunger and lack of sleep. That should count for something right?

Thankfully the slight went unnoticed, or maybe he just wasn't concerned with it. I grabbed a really sharp stick, or at least it looked fairly so, opened the net and the best I could stabbed the fish.

Why the hell was it still moving? I kept staring at the wriggling thing, willing it to die so I could stop feeling so guilty. Was it supposed to do that?

Shrugging, I stuck the other side of the wood into the ground and went back to the river, hoping for a repeat performance.

The sun was finally making its way into the world, its golden glow too bright against the shimmering water.

I had in fact caught plenty of fish with my little trick surprisingly enough, and had found that with enough patience I could catch more than one at a time, and in no time breakfast was quite literally in the bag.

I even gave a few to Kilala, since she had gone out of her way to bring me here.

Glancing behind me let me know that a certain silver haired, golden eyed nuisance was still around. Why the heck was he still here. In fact, why had Kilala even wanted to drop by next to him at all?

Looking at my furry companion provided no answers. She was too busy pawing at a still wriggling fish on a stick, her tails swishing this way and that, seeming to enjoy the victims eternal struggle.

Sadist much?

Obviously I had trailed off topic. Why was Sesshomaru here. No way could he have wasted his time here just to see if I could catch a fish.

He has a life after all right? Right?!

"Priestess, are you going to spend all day staring at the ground?" His question made me jump. Honestly I found it weird that he was talking to me.

"I was just wondering why you were here," the words were out of mouth before I could stop them, and I could see the sharp look he shot at me before I went back to looking at the ground, already mumbling an apology for my impudence.

Seriously, that was rude, even if he wasn't some stuck up lord with a power complex.

"I do not need to explain myself to the likes of you." Wow no need to be mean about it.

But I am alive. Guess he's actually feeling pretty generous. Still, he did not move from his spot.

Sighing, I gave up. So what if he didn't have a life and deemed watching me catch fish to be one of his favorite pastimes. Who was I to judge. Hmm.

Now the real hard part. How was I going to get all this fish back to camp. I picked at my pajama sleeve, which by now was soaking wet, along with the matching pants. I probably smelled like fish too.

Sniffing myself would probably be a very bad idea right now. Seriously, why was that guy still here?

I could put the fish in my bag, but then there is that whole 'it'll make my bag smell like fish' deal. and there was no way I had enough ziplock bags for everything. Besides, those were used to collect herbs in.

Looking at the net, I knew there was no way it would be strong or big enough to carry that much fish. I had caught at least 12, not including the ones Kilala had eaten.

If only I had some sort of bucket to put them in. Come on book bag don't fail me now!

Despite popular belief though, I was not Mary Poppins and could not make whatever I wished for appear in my bag. I'd have to come up with something. How do people in my time usually carry fish? Other than a bucket…which I unfortunately did not have.

Of course I just had to leave my pot for cooking on the fire. Real smart Kagome.

I seemed to remember someone holding fish by a string through their mouths or something like that. Did I have anything like that?

Somehow, I don't think my needle and thread would do the job.

Five minutes of prowling through my back pack left me empty handed.

The next time I go home I'm bringing back stuff that is actually useful I grumbled. Right…so apparently I need to use my environment. Looking around left to right, all I saw were trees, rocks, river and dirt.

Not what I'd call my best line up. Taking notice of Sesshomaru's massive presence, I could feel a moment of embarrassment hit me, but hey, when had I ever been afraid to ask for help?

"So…if you were going to bring more than a handful of fish back to camp, how would you do it?" I asked, trying to sound casual.

He glanced my way, cold and calculating, as if trying to decide if my question was worth an answer or if he should just save himself the trouble and just murder me. I'm sure no one would find my body if he did.

"This Sesshomaru would fish closer to camp," he finally said.

Ha! Hahahahah A comedian. Classic. That was just the answer I was looking for.

Without my say so, my lips twitched with the urge to laugh, despite myself. Who knew Mr. Ice King with the bad attitude could actually crack a joke.

"Well what if you decided to go out of your way, far from camp to fish, THEN how would you carry it." Yeah, joke your way out of that one you jerk.

"This Sesshomaru would not make such a folly. Perhaps if poor planning had been avoided, your camp would already be eating." His smirk should be illegal.

I pouted. Seriously. Couldn't help myself. I was just trying to be helpful to my friends, really I was. He didn't have to make fun of me for it.

The sun had finally risen, and its cheery rays of sunshine seemed to glisten silver strands of hair, giving off an almost golden appearance.

His hair looked really thick…really…strong. Hmmm.

"Lord Sesshomaru, I have a question." I said, still staring at his oh so perfect hair. Hair that he seemed to have an abundance of.

He shot me a dark look. Perhaps I should stop asking him questions.

"Its a serious question I swear!" Was it just me or did I just see him flex his claws?

"Proceed…carefully" he finally answered, telling me that I was on thin ice with him. Hopefully it wouldn't crack.

"Can I have…some of your hair?"

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Say whaaaat? Kagome are you crazy? Ha sorry couldn't help myself. Please be sure to review! I have over 60 followers yet only 5 reviews/chapter. Very confusing math there. So please be sure to tell me what you think. I appreciate it!


	7. The Trade

Hi everyone! Sorry for the super late post. To be honest I was a little stumped on how I wanted to go about this chapter, and of course life got in the way. I am pretty proud at how this turned out though, and I think you'll like it to. Just enough tease to keep us all wanting more! Thank you again to all my devoted fans and the new ones! Hope you like it and PLEASE REVIEW!

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of the characters displayed in this. It is only fiction people!

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**Chapter 7: The Trade**

Sometimes I wish I had a rewind button for my mouth.

Not that the word rewind has been invented yet but still. I mean, if I think about it, I'm sure that would have saved me a lot of pain and suffering in the long run.

Oh Kagome, when will you learn to shut your big fat mouth. Then I wouldn't be in this position.

What position you might ask?. Only a very deadly, highly poisonous clawed hand trying to dig its way into my scalp as it held my hair taught.

"That hurts you jerk! Let me go NOW!" Okay, so obviously asking for Sesshomaru's hair is off limits. How was I suppose to know? Its not like he was doing anything with all that silver nonsense anyways.

"Human, would you care to repeat your request," a dry, arrogant tone asked, lifting my head a little higher. I could barely touch the ground anymore.

A frustrated, pained scream ripped through me, and I could hear a roaring sound answering its call.

Kilala's gigantic muzzle chomping on Sesshomaru's arm was all I could make out before my vision was blurred by tears and thick white fur.

Still my skull was not released from his god like grip, and I was starting to feel like I was going to be sick. Preferably all over a certain demon lords precious hair if I could project my vomit just right.

Without warning, I was let go, causing me to fall not so gracefully to the ground, though to be honest he could have thrown me into a tree and I still would have cried out in relief.

My head freaking hurt like he had just kicked the crap out of it.

"Ugh, remind me never to ask anything from you ever again," I moaned, trying to convince the pulsing in my head to stop.

When I finally gained the ability to look up, I was struck by an odd sight.

There was Kilala, now hunched on her side with what looked to be a very angry Sesshomaru on top of her, his jaws stretched around her neck, and his eyes as red as hers. I felt a shiver run through my body at the primitive sight.

Flames burst around my feline companion, and then she was her small defenseless self, pitifully hanging from elongated fangs.

"Kilala!" Without a second thought I ran to her, and as gently as I could removed her small body from his mouth.

A tiny mewl was all I got before she curled into a tight little ball in my arms. Tentatively, I checked for blood.

I released a breath I didn't even realize I had been holding when my search came up empty. At least he wasn't being a total asshole.

"What the heck was that for?!" Okay, so maybe yelling at him wasn't the smartest thing to do. When it came to my friends, my mouth usually started saying things before I could think.

A slender pink tongue snuck past his lips, slowly licking the tips of his fangs before he set his expression into a sadistic smirk.

A shudder of fear struck me as I looked into scarlet eyes, in a moment feeling like rabbit fleeing from the big bad wolf. Or in this case, dog.

"She opposed me. I taught the feline her place. You would do well to learn yours," Sesshomaru stated, his tall frame now practically towering over me, as if to point out just how small and fragile I really was.

I cuddled Kilala closer, but it did no good, the fire cat was passed out. It dawned on me that Sesshomaru was right.

In this time and place, he is a lord, ruler of the Wester lands. While I, a nobody with barely any powers to speak of and not a yen to my name, had no right to ask anything of him.

I was actually pretty fortunate to be alive if I think about it.

This isn't Tokyo. This was the feudal lands. In these times, power meant everything. People and demons are not seen as equals here, and as frustrating as it is, if I want to start living here, I need to start acting like I belong.

Pride was something I clung to for dear life since I came to this world, but I no longer had Inuyasha to defend me when I decided that the rules didn't apply to me.

Not knowing what else to do, I bowed, my chest and head parallel to the ground, and I kept my eyes focused on it, not wanting to grant him the sight of my reddening cheeks,

"I'm sorry Lord Sesshomaru, what I said was rude, what I had meant was that I would like to use a piece of your hair to string the fish I had caught together, but I can see now that was completely improper on my part. I apologize."

I kept my gaze lowered, and forced myself not to shift uneasily as his silently gazed down at me. I could only hope the blood lust has left his eyes.

"You wish to submit to me?" His question coated in rough undertone threw me off balance, and for a moment my blue eyes darted up to meet his, seeing his right eyebrow raised in slight disbelief.

His eyes were still red, but they they were no longer dilated, and I could tell the beast inside him was withdrawing.

"I'd be a fool not to…wouldn't I?" For a long while I was met with silence, as if he was contemplating this turn of events.

In the past, I had always stayed at Inuyasha's side, foolishly cheering for him when he fought against his older brother. I never put a lot of thought into it, how this demon whose experience and talent with the sword could kill me, him, anyone really.

If Sesshomaru had wanted to kill Inuyasha, he would be dead. End of story. Yes Inuyasha had surprised him a time or two. However, if there were no swords with mystical powers involved, just raw strength and talent, there was not a doubt in my mind that the being before me would win.

Inuyasha had grown cocky, and in a way so had I. Somehow, during all the adventure and fighting for the jewel we had forgotten one simple fact. Inuyasha was practically useless without Tessaiga.

With that, came the undeniable truth. I was even more useless, with powers that were unstable at best, and aim that relied more on luck than actual practiced skill.

With this harsh reality looming over me, all I could do was reply with a quiet "yes."

I could feel that strong schoolgirl who had crossed through the well all those years ago vanish, replaced by an uncertain 17 year old girl, who no longer had even ground to stand on.

"Are you not of that half breeds pack. I was under the notion that you refused to submit to anyone but him."

Just like that my fire was back, and before I could stop it, my wretched mouth opened.

"I will never submit to him!" my eyes met his again, boldly proclaiming the truth of my words. Sure I relied on Inuyasha for strength, and aloud him to call me names and walk all over me, but those times were done. There would be no repeat of that, what happened the day before reinforcing my thoughts.

"He is no longer your alpha?" The question gave me pause, and for a second I had to think what the meaning behind his words meant.

To dogs and other pack animals, alpha meant leader. For the longest time, Inuyasha had been our leader. Yet, the most recent argument had broke him from our group, leaving us without his leadership for the first time.

Had my act of defiance doomed us all? Would he come back? Do I even want him to?

"No, he is no longer my alpha." Vulnerability was something that I was not used to, yet lately, it seemed to follow my every step. With Inuyasha gone, how could I even begin to think I could survive here?

Cold, calculating eyes bore into me, and I wanted desperately to wrap my arms around myself to somehow shield my body from his gaze.

"Submit." The command was lost on me.

Submit? Hadn't I already done that by bowing to him. What more could he possibly want. Unsure, my eyes slowly went back to observing the ground, and my back became parallel once more to the earth.

Should I get on my knees. Beg for my life? Grovel? What did he want from me?!

So soft that I barely heard, an irritated sigh tore through him, and he began walking toward me, until he stood before my now shivering figure.

Warm fingers touched my neck, and I instantly broke out into goose bumps. I stood still, unsure what to expect.

Without a word, he brushed my long raven hair off of my left shoulder. My brain felt empty, all thought came to a screeching halt, and unconsciously I tilted my head towards my right, giving full view to the left side of my fragile neck.

A low hum of approval was heard, before something sharp pricked my exposed skin.

'He just bit me!' I parted my lips, to scream, to cry, to tell him to stop, but no sound came out. All I could do was feel.

Feel how warm his breath felt on my neck. How my blood seemed to become fire where his fangs touched flesh. How a part deep deep inside me, so primitive I hadn't even realized it was there, practically purred at the power he was displaying over me.

"A-alpha?" I called, the word foreign but for some reason felt right at the moment. A small growl vibrated against my neck, an acknowledgement if nothing else.

Things seemed to be spinning out of control all of a sudden, and yet one thing was clear. Sesshomaru wasn't hurting me. I clung to the thought, hoping that this possible alliance wasn't too good to be true.

"What will you give me?" He murmured, his lips brushing against the skin of my neck, and I could feel my knees weaken at the sensation.

"Give?" I asked, mind racing at the implications. When he asked me to submit, he didn't mean…sexually…did he?

"For my hair, what would you give me in return for my generosity. Hmmm bitch." For some reason, that word didn't seem offending at all, or maybe my brain was just becoming a mushy mess, kind of like my knees funny enough.

"Ummm, well what do you want for it?" Apparently bargaining was not my thing, and by the smirk I could feel against my jugular, he knew it.

"You have not yet shown me what you can offer for it." his smooth baritone sounded almost…amused?

I'm pretty sure my ears weren't deceiving me but then again, could Sesshomaru find things funny? That would require him to have feelings, and that was something I most certainly had never given thought to before.

"Offer?" God if this continues he's going to think I have the brain of a parrot.

But it is not my fault. Sure I was used to men, after all Koga has always been more than obvious with his affections and occasionally Inuyasha and I would have our moments, not to mention Miroku's wandering hand, yet still, never had a man (did demon males really count as men?) been so close and personal to me.

I could practically feel my pulse beat again his lips and my whole face burst in flames, his breath fanning them to full throttle.

Even though fear kept me rooted, (after all, what exactly was he implying?) anticipation kept tingles running up and down my spine.

This was new, uncharted territory, and lets just face it, I've missed out on my teenage romance drama years by being here.

Sure I've seen a lot more than any other ordinary school girl could hope to dream of, but the romance department had been kind of lacking, especially for the past year.

"You carry…peculiar items in that bag of yours." His teeth were now scraping against the bite he made on my neck, just barely brushing skin, but it felt dangerous and invigorating all at the same time.

…Wait…bag?

"You want to trade with me?" my voice cracking towards the end.

'Real smooth Kagome. Thats what you get for letting your mind drift in the proverbial gutter. Really, you should be ashamed of yourself!'

Sharp teeth finally stopped their dance across human skin as he finally took a step back. Warily I looked up at him, unsure of what else to do. The silver hair I coveted seemed to shimmer in the rising sun, taking on an almost blonde hue in its radiance.

Sesshomaru was beautiful, no matter how you looked at him, even with the missing arm, he was not lacking in any sense of the word.

'And he just gave ME a hickey!'

Okay, I think he did…probably. He bit me. Thats how hickeys are made right?

My fingers twitched at the urge to touch my neck and feel what kind of mark he might have left there.

"If you have anything this Sesshomaru might deem acceptable then I will forget your prior insolence and allow trade." Okay so maybe his conversation skills were a little lacking.

On autopilot, as my brain was in no way ready to start thinking rational thoughts, I walked over to my bag and started setting things out.

Most of my things from the future had been thrown away earlier, in my attempt to become part of this world's norm. Suddenly I was regretting that decision.

For his part, the demon seemed genuinely curious of what my bag held. I took my bow and net off the table, there was no way he was getting either of those!

Finally, he began sniffing at a small packet, holding the small square delicately between his fingers before turning towards me.

"Woman, what is this?" Well I guess that was one step up from bitch. Somehow I don't thing spelling out my name to him would get him to say it. In fact, I'm sure it would give me a one way trip to the underworld, so I kept my irritation to myself.

"It is a tea packet. That one in particular is green tea." An eyebrow raised in interest, and he continued his silent observation of the packet.

My lips twitched into a small smirk, and I knew I had him. Hook, line and sinker. Now to just reel him in.

"I would be willing to make you that tea in exchange for a strand of your hair."

For a few moments there was silence, but in the end, it appeared the great ruler of the west had a weakness, and that seemed to be for a good cup of tea.

Gracefully he handed the packet to me, and without a word I began grabbing all the materials needed for my endeavor.

Fire wood was gathered, durable looking twigs for the fire making, leaves and moss and of course my trusty teapot. Sure I thought about throwing that away, but it was way too convenient not to have.

Biting my lower lip, I sent a small prayer to the gods, hoping that they would aid me in not making a fool of myself and assist in making this whole ordeal a short one. How ridiculous would it be if I took an hour just to make a darn fire?

Thankfully after a minute a small flame appeared, and with the speed even Sesshomaru surely had to be jealous of, I aided its tiny life with moss and leaves, stoking it to its full potential. More moss and leaves were added until I was satisfied that the fire was warm and big enough for what I had planned.

I then took some water from the stream in my trusty ceramic teapot, and after some careful maneuvering, the pot was secure in its place above the flames, slowly boiling all the bacteria out of its watery depths.

Once the teapot was warmed I poured the water out, and then restarted the process by using a cup and pouring new water in once again. After all, I wanted to make sure the teapot was fully clean before actually making the tea.

Sesshomaru watched in silence, and I could feel his gaze watching every one of my actions, looking for anything out of place.

Maybe, just maybe I wasn't completely hopeless 100% of the time. Hopefully this tea tasted pleasing enough to his highness to allow this trade to pull through. When the water was finally at a complete boil.

Opening the packet, I produced a tea bag and carefully put it into the pot, trying my best to avoid the possibility of the steam burning my skin.

Once done, I grabbed a hand towel from my bag, using the protection to grab the tea kettle from the open flames, and then delicately poured the tea into two white ceramic cups. Sure they were kind of drab and had more than a few scratches but at least they got the job done.

After a moment, I handed Sesshomaru his cup and we waited in silence for the tea to cool to a tolerable level.

It was strange, how relaxed the atmosphere was. Where was the fighting for my life? The name calling? The drama?

* * *

Yet only the light splashing of the stream could be heard, a light breeze shuffling through the dew covered leaves, and birds singing their joy of greeting a new beautiful day.

Seeing Sesshomaru eyeing his tea suspiciously, I took the first sip, allowing him to see that I had not contaminated the brew.

After a time, he took his first sip, again that cursed eyebrow raising at the taste.

'So THAT is the key to his poker face.' I thought, observing him as secretly as I could under my lashes.

"It is not bitter."

For a moment I tilted my head, unsure of how to respond. Did he want it to be bitter? But as I thought on the subject, I realized he was just questioning the taste. Tea was served in the form of tea leaves in this era, giving it the traditional bitter taste that he was accustomed to.

"Thats because the leaves are crushed inside the tea bag, keeping it from producing the bitter taste." I tried to keep my answers simple. It really would not due for Sesshomaru to suddenly become curious as to where I could procure such things.

His eyes narrowed in thought, I could already see him trying to process this new revelation.

"This Sesshomaru was not aware that tea could come in…bags." His gaze was on me now, and I could tell lying would not be the way to go in this situation.

"They are from my home." Not technically a lie.

He continued staring, as if to get me to elaborate. My mouth, for once, stayed firmly shut.

Eventually his attention turned back to the tea, and a second sip was taken.

I suddenly felt like I could breathe again.

Soon the tea was gone, and as I turned to put out the flames, so was he. In his place, a few strands of long, lovely silver hair lay under an empty tea cup.

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Please review :)


	8. The Preparation

Hi everyone! Sorry for the late update. I had finished the chapter but scrapped it since I just wasn't liking how it turned out. Still unsure about this chapter, I hate making too many differences in the plot, but I felt like it was necessary. I hope you guys like it! Don't forget to review! How I have over 120 follows and 8 reviews/chapter is beyond me -.-;

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Inuyasha or the characters in this fanfiction.

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**Chapter 8: The Preparation**

Like the softest of silks his hair whispered through my fingers, almost as if they were telling me secrets that no one else could know. Then again, how many people had ever actually touched this silver finery?

Surely no one alive that was for certain.

Yet here they were, wrapped around my hand as if they were meant to be there. The delicate looking strands however deceived even the most keen observer.

Though soft to the touch, it was also surprisingly strong. No tugging could cause them to break, not a single split end was to be seen. These tresses were from one of the strongest demons alive and not even his hair could be considered a weakness.

To think all he wanted for these rare beauties was a cup of tea.

One would have been enough. and yet he left me three. Who knew Sesshomaru could be such a stand up guy?

Then again, maybe I just make really great tea. Whatever the reason, I had no time to wonder upon it.

It had taken a bit of time, but I was able to use an arrow head to pierce holes into the mouthes of the fish I had caught before tying them up one by one using only a strand of Sesshomaru's hair.

By the end of it, they were neatly hanging from the gleaming silver chord, the weight not seeming to bother the strand at all.

After a quick dip in the stream to get rid of the stench of fish that I just knew would cling to me for days, I changed into a simple blue t-shirt and black running shorts.

It was time to depart.

Kilala soon after woke up, and we were on our way back to camp before I knew it, breakfast securely tied around the fire cats scruff. Definitely would need to clean it if we wanted to eat without the taste of cat fur.

Gross.

As we traveled through the air, the morning sun hit us with her warmth, giving birth to a beautiful day. Yet my thoughts weren't really on the scenery. In fact, they kept drifting back to a certain demon lord, whose eyes held hellfire, and touch sent shivers down my spine.

I couldn't figure out if they were the good or bad kind.

It wasn't like he meant anything sexual about the bite. In retrospect, he was showing his dominance over me, something I never thought I'd ever allow from any man. If Inuyasha had tried something like that I would have sat him into next Sunday.

Yet when Sesshomaru asked me to submit, I knew I had no say in the matter. Strange as it was, it felt good to let him show his power over me. A part of me had liked it. Maybe it was because in some way it made me feel safe

Never once had I really been on my own before the incident the other night. Needless to say it was eye opening how little I knew about this world. How easy it could be for me to die. Inuyasha had always been there to rescue me and then all of a sudden he wasn't.

Earlier this morning I had denounced his leadership in our group to one of our most powerful enemies. What would Sesshomaru do with that information? He seemed pleased that I had called him alpha.

What exactly did that entail? Obviously he wasn't traveling with us, however I knew that this morning would not be the last I saw of the silver haired dog demon. My thoughts then jumped to Rin.

The young raven haired child seemed to trust Sesshomaru with her life. Following him with the devotion of a puppy. Maybe thats what she was to him. A pup to take care of. He obviously cared about her.

No way would he let her follow him if it irritated him. So did that make her his pack. I don't remember seeing any bite marks on her neck though. So why me? Maybe because she already knew her place and he didn't feel the need to put her in it. Hadn't he bitten Kilala to show dominance.

A vision of blood red eyes staring at me as the kitten hung defenseless from him fangs caused a violent shiver to run through me, and my fingers to once more trail back up to the left side of my neck, feeling where he had almost gently bit me.

I could feel his warm breath brushing against the sensitive flesh, and my body falling slack in his possession. What was it with canines having the constant need to be dominant over me?

First Inuyasha, then Koga, now Sesshomaru? Did I have some weird pheromone that attracted them to me or something. The idea of the cardinal lord feeling that way for me though was straight up laughable though.

For now, I would put the thought behind me. The issue would eventually come up, but for right now it wasn't important. I had breakfast to make after all.

Reaching camp, everyone was already awake. Shippo was the first to take notice of our approach, and practically howled in excitement as he jumped into my arms, already nuzzling into my hair and telling me how much he missed me and how worried they were.

"I'm sorry I took so long guys, I was hoping to be back before you woke up but I guess I'm still pretty slow at this."

I couldn't help but notice the slack jaws of my friends as they stared at my large catch. It had been awhile since we had a full meal for breakfast.

The fire was made and fish cleaned and gutted, which I had of course done myself under Sango's careful guidance.

Soon the air was filled with the scent of roasted meat and our feast was ready.

It was an entirely different experience to eat food that you had caught yourself. To watch your friends grateful expressions as they dug into fresh meat. For the first time in awhile, I was confident, and filled with a sense of pride.

I had fed my pack. I had used hard work and effort to fill their stomachs. They were appreciative to MY efforts. For once, I was the one providing and it wasn't instant cup noodle either. It was an amazing feeling. I vowed then and there that I would never allow them to go hungry.

These people, my friends, had protected me and watched my back over and over. Finally I could give back. Even if it was something as simple as making breakfast. What should I make for lunch then?

"I think it might be best to drop by my home so I can gather supplies." Without Inuyasha, we were now severely lacking in resources that we didn't have to worry about before. For instance, a way to carry that fish.

As useful as Sesshomaru's hair was, I felt guilty using such a gorgeous thing to hang fish from. The fact he let me was just mind blowing. The strands were now braided and wrapped around my right wrist, the silver color gleaming in the light in an almost bewitching type of twinkle.

Sango and Miroku seemed to think about it, before nodding in agreement. We were pretty poor to be honest, not having any spare change for what will be needed for the upcoming journey. Going back to Kaede's village to restock would be wise, not to mention I could grab things from home that could come in handy.

The four of us finished eating before putting out the fire, gathering our things, and then taking off on Kilala's back. It must have been tiring for her, carrying the four of us, yet she flew as fast as she could.

Thankfully we weren't too far from the village, and it took only a few hours to reach there.

It was odd, going home without the usual fuss. Normally I would have to fight tooth and nail to get Inuyasha to let me go home. Yet the dog eared half demon was nowhere in sight. I felt a pang in my heart, but tried my best to ignore it.

I could worry about him later.

The bone eaters well came into view, and for a short while I took it in, enjoying the peaceful atmosphere that always came from being in the clearing.

If you closed your eyes, you could hear nature all around you, chirping, buzzing, foraging.

The sound was relaxing, and after a breath of fresh air, I turned around and jumped into the dark abyss that would send me home.

It took about an hour to get out of my mother's grasp and away from Grandpa and Sota's questioning.

After some quick research on the internet, I found some ideas to make my time in the feudal era a little more proficient.

Quickly I disinfected my stomach wound, which thankfully had not become infected during the days adventures, the stitches still holding tight. Unfortunately, even in the future, money was tight.

I didn't bother asking mom for money. She had already given so much, how could I possibly ask for more. Instead I took off for the old storage room that Grandpa kept most of our artifacts and just plain junk in.

Tying up my hair in a high ponytail, I took a deep breath of fresh air before opening the storage shed, dust instantly coming out like a tidal wave. I had a vague idea of what I was looking for, but that didn't make my mission any easier.

Hours of sorting through things went by before I was satisfied with my haul.

A long net that would hopefully be big enough to lay across a shallow stream, making catching fish a breeze with a little bit of patience. A new stock of arrows that were still in pretty decent condition considering what era they probably came from. Flint and fire making stones and a few hunting knives to help with the cutting of meals. A locket with a compass in it was also inventoried.

Of course my favorite was a few pairs of plain colored yukatas that would help for "fitting in" if we ever came across a village and a pair of simple sandals from a previous festival I had gone to. Three wardrobes of traditional white haori with dark green hakamas were also found.

I studied those for a moment, wondering what I could do with them. It was still hot out in the feudal era. I wasn't exactly used to wearing the clothing either, and would be expected to run a lot, not to mention hunt.

The decision was immediate. I would hem off the sleeves and turn a pair of hakama into shorts. A standard pink obi was found to complete the look. I even discovered a pair of fighting arm guards!

It wasn't much, but it would do for my new look. I even found some coins that were actually for the feudal era. It wasn't a lot, but it should be able to help. Hopefully grandpa didn't notice…

Mom was thrilled with the idea of a project, and instantly began hemming up the clothes to my size, thankfully more useful in this area then I was. She truly was a jack of all trades when it came to housework. She even added a piece of green cloth to opening where my sleeves were supposed to be, giving it a more feminine, matching feel.

Soon my new wardrobe was ready, and I tried on the sleeveless shirt, the flowing shorts, and the feminine obi. It was soft yet durable, the shorts just past my thighs so they wouldn't chafe on our adventures. What about shoes?

I looked in my closet, yet the idea of running around in sandals did not sound pleasant, no matter how well Miroku pulled it off. In the end I decided on a pair of flat, soft, black leather boots that went mid calf. Hopefully the would be more durable than the shoes I wore to school.

Seriously wondering why I had been wearing a school girl uniform for the past two years to the feudal era. Had I been high? How exactly had I not been raped? It was no wonder I got kidnaped so often.

The new look was strange, but comfortable. It would have to do. Was there anything else I could need? Mother had already packed a refreshed first aid kit for me, and some bread and meat buns for the road. My sleeping bag was still a must, plus all my new supplies.

Grandpa had discovered a book of outdoor survival skills for me to make use of, as well as a book for different types of plants and herbs. Sota snuck in a few other books I didn't pay too much attention to, other than the fact they were blissfully light.

Filled up water canteens, one for each member of our group were also stored. It was a no brainer that having Inuyasha around had made our journey almost painfully simple. We had never worried about surviving. He always made sure we managed.

What exactly had I done?

Trying hard not to think about it, I picked up my bag, which was thankfully not too heavy, and began hugging my family goodbye, pushing away the thought that this might be the last time I saw them. Why had I not thought about that before?

It wasn't like we hadn't been chasing down a homicidal half demon bent on world destruction for the past two years or anything. Not to mention living in a world where basically anything could kill me. Seriously starting to wonder about my life choices here.

I didn't have the heart to inform my family of Inuyasha's departure from the group. How our survival might be severely compromised. How a demon lord had been taking strange interest in me lately.

Instead I smiled at them, before disappearing to 500 years in the past. Maybe I should have spent more time with them. I hid away from the thought, knowing it would only make me miss them more.

I had a duty to complete after all.

Everyone was waiting for me on the other side, even Kaede. A beautiful black mare with white socks and a simple white diamond on her forehead stood fidgeting next to the old women, her doe brown eyes staring at me as her mane blew in the wind.

Apparently the village had given us a horse to lug my butt around. I tried my best to decline the offer, but Miroku and Sango were set on it. Inuyasha was gone and we needed transportation. Apparently that came in the form of the beautifully evil creature in front of me.

Hopefully she was more comfortable than Inuyasha's back.

I didn't hold my breath on that one.

Thankfully she was saddled, and had packs that I could unload most of my back pack into. I kept the essentials on me though. Last thing I need is some crazy horse taking off with all my survival supplies.

I had learned my lesson once already thank you!

Nervously I mounted her, Shippo deciding on the safe side and boarding Kilala. The traitor.

"Okay pony, don't throw me off ok. I'm kind of new at this whole horse riding thing." The horse bayed but stayed impatiently still as I tried to get my leg thrown over her back.

Lets just say third time is the charm when I finally righted myself on her. The height instantly had me clinging to the reins, my thighs nervously clenching to her sides.

Her back was slightly higher off the ground than Kilala's but it still scared me nonetheless. Thank god she couldn't fly.

"What is her name?" I asked, trying hard not to focus on the nervous nausea I was trying to push down. Did this thing have a stop button? Somehow I doubt she would catch me if I fell. Where was a helmet when you needed one.

"Fuko, child. She is the village's fastest mare and though has a wild temper, she will carry ye where ye need to go." Kaede's calm voice did nothing to settle my nerves? Temper…wild? That didn't sound good at all. Maybe I should just ride on Kilala while Miroku rode this monster.

Looking up at my so called friends, they were already on Kilala, pointedly not looking at me while the fire cat rose in the air. Seriously? Who needs enemies with friends like mine?

Kaede was steadily adjusting the foot handles for me, making sure my feet hung at a reasonable height in them on both sides while explaining in a hushed tones the different commands to give to the horse with my body language before she deemed me ready.

For a second I wondered if maybe I should tie myself to the horse so I wouldn't fall off, before Fuko started trotting.

The pace was bumpy, but strangely reminded me of Inuyasha, and I quickly got into the groove of it, trying my best to adjust to the movement of her back. The thing that scared me the most was not having someone to cling to, instead relying on my grip on the reins.

All of sudden she stopped, snorting impatiently and shaking her head and pulling against her bit.

"W-whats wrong?" Gods I was nervous.

"Kagome! Loosen up on the reins!" Sango called, pointing towards my white knuckled death grip on the reins.

Oh…

Gulping, I gave her some rein, and instantly the horse started trotting again, now going slightly faster with her new found freedom. A few times of adjusting my grip gave me the feeling of the mare below me, what made her go faster, what made her slow down.

It was scary and thrilling all in one, but damn the trotting made my stitches burn.

Before long, the village was in the distance, and we were one with the wind, taking our adventure in stride. I had no idea where we would be going, as we had no leads on any shikon jewel shards, but that didn't stop us.

For now, we were on the road, and my journey to self discovery was about to begin.

God I think I might actually throw up after all.

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Please review! ^.^


	9. The Act

Hello everyone! Posting this chapter a little earlier than planned but I was just so inspired I couldn't help myself. I just want to be clear. I did not write this to make anyone happy, or because someone told me to. I had always planned for things to work themselves out, but one of the reviews inspired me to write it slightly different than originally thought of but I feel like this way worked best with the story line.

I hope everyone enjoys this slightly more original concept, and if you don't, I understand. I can't please everyone. I'm happy with this story and that is all that matters. :D

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or its characters. I do, however, completely own this plot so don't even think about telling me otherwise.

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**Chapter 9: The Act**

Eyes the color of warm golden honey watched as the young woman-child from the future sped off on her black steed, matching ponytails flying in the wind as the horse seemed to grow wings made of wind, leaving only a trail of dust behind.

A two tailed cat could be seen a short distance above, carrying two adults and a child on its broad furry back, taking strides through the sky with only flames keeping them airborne in the late afternoon.

It truly was a sight to behold.

"Was it really such a smart idea to put Kagome on that crazy horse old hag?"

The young looking silver haired man stopped next to the elderly Kaede, his waist length hair gently dancing with the wind, arms crossed in his ever present red haori, pointed dog ears flicking to and fro, listening to even the faintest of sounds.

The old woman gave him a secretive smile, and could not stop the slight chuckle from escaping her wrinkled lips, though in the end it turned into a slight cough. Age was not kind to her this day.

"Aye Inuyasha. She will be fine, ye needn't worry."

The half demon frowned, still concerned but let the topic drop.

"Keh! Whose worried about who. I'm just saying she's gonna have a lot harder time finding the jewel shards if her head is cracked in two."

His coarse words did not match his eyes however, as they stared off where the young woman was last seen.

"If ye are so worried, then chase after her." The elderly priestess then turned, intent on going back to her hut, as there were never a short supply of things for her to do.

For a moment there was a gust of wind, then silence. She knew even without looking behind her, the young pup had done just that.

"Children are so impatient these days."

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I hate horses. I hate shorts. I hate riding stupid horses in stupid shorts. Thank god I'm not wearing a skirt right now. Did I mention how much I seriously hate this horse?!

It had barely been an hour since we had traveled from the village, and already my thighs felt like someone was pulverizing them with a meat grinder.

"If someone would have told me I was going to be horse back riding I wouldn't have cut up these hakamas," I muttered bitterly. Okay, maybe I was laying it down a little thick, but for the love of god, someone needed to stop this thing!

Fuko seemed not to notice my discomfort, or maybe she really didn't care, as she continued on her crazy pace, my arms long since clutching onto her neck for dear life, more than a few times almost falling off the wild beast.

Most girls wanted a pony for christmas. Not me. I would have been perfectly happy with a new hair brush or perhaps a fruity scented body lotion kit. I was starting to wonder if body lotion was a real thing these days.

Whatever the case may be, it didn't change the fact that my thighs were killing me, my stomach felt tight, and I'm pretty sure I threw up in my mouth a couple times.

You'd think riding on Inuyasha's back all these years would have prepared me for this. Yet his back was strong, familiar, and comforting. I tightened my hands in the Fuko's mane, willing away the tears.

What was he doing now? Was he still mad. Was I still mad? Will he ever come back? Did I want him to?

Those questions kept coming back. There was no way I could forget two years of friendship. Sure he was a jerk sometimes. I knew that from the beginning. Even he had admitted he was wrong about hurting me. Like a fool though, I had pushed the issue, rubbing in his face about hanging out with Sesshomaru.

There was a part of me that was empty and scared with him gone. Our rag tag group wasn't the same without his loud crass mouth. He had only stated the truth and I got mad about it. For years I had been blindly following him, barely making an effort to expand my powers or try to fit into this era.

What if now I was too late?

It wasn't like I wanted us to get together or anything. Okay, that is a lie. I would do just about anything to make him look at me as more than a reflection of his previous love. That ship had sailed though.

I could change my clothes, cut my hair, tattoo my face and still somehow look like her. Like Kikyo.

How could I change how he felt though. If a man who looked like Inuyasha came into my life in the future, wouldn't I be just as willing to look at face value too?

To be completely honest I wasn't sure anymore.

"If you let this horse go any faster you are gonna fall off." I blinked. Blinked again. Inuyasha?

As crazy as it was, I could swear I heard his voice, right behind me. Yet, when I braved a look over my shoulder, no one was there. I had half expected to see him standing there, his cocky smirk on his face, arms crossed as if he wasn't standing barefoot on top of a demon-like horse.

But he wasn't.

Looking around, everything was just a blur of color, and I could tell that my subconscious, that sounded oddly enough like Inuyasha, was right. This horse was indeed trying to kill me.

I had to find a way to slow her down. A stop too fast would send me flying, and right now I really didn't want to deal with any broken bones thank you very much.

Slowly, I released her mane from my right hand, reaching down with shaky fingers till I eventually found the rein. I tried tightening it, yet with barely any strength in one hand, it didn't seem to phase the mare at all.

I tried screaming at her to stop, yet the speed remained unchanged.

I was now completely and utterly terrified. How could I make her stop? That would require me letting go of her neck, and right now that didn't seem like much of an option. I could try kicking her ribs, but what if that made it worse.

What if she reared back?

'This has to be the worst decision I've ever made in my life.' Mournful thoughts would not save me now.

Perhaps I should just hang on until she stops on her own. She has to get tired eventually right? Where were Sango and Miroku. An airlift rescue sounded liked a god send right about now.

My head stayed firmly in black hair that wasn't my own, the coarse strands itching my face as it lashed the sensitive skin, causing my eyes to water. At this point, I was too scared to even look up and try to catch sight of my friends. Couldn't they see I was in distress?

Gulping down the nausea that was coursing through me, I brought the rein up and over to my left hand, tightening my thighs with all my might to keep from falling off. Finally gathering my courage I pushed off from my only safe haven, and rode with the wind.

It was like being on a roller coaster with no seat belt.

I began pulling the rein up towards my chest, not too fast, but enough to catch Fuko's attention.

An angry whine filled the air, echoing with the fast pulsing air.

A few more pulls and the scenery was starting to make sense again. Blurs were becoming trees, poofs were becoming clouds and oh my god was that grass?

Sweet mother of all that is holy the ride was over. My head was spinning from dizziness, my mouth was dry, and I'm pretty sure my once beautiful thighs were now scratched up to hell but damn I could kiss the dirt right now I was so happy to see it.

"Kagome are you alright?" That sounded like Shippo, yet the adrenaline was still rushing through my body and I could barely hear, only able to push my shaking hands against the saddle and somehow fall off.

I blacked out before I could hit the ground.

* * *

"I told you getting her a horse was a stupid idea. This stupid independent crap is nuts. She nearly died!"

"Inuyasha, calm down. Lady Kagome was able to manage just fine. She must have passed out from over exertion."

"Since when is 'over exertion' and down right terrified the same thing monk?"

There was a moment of silence.

"Kagome was able to stop the horse on her own. That has to count for something."

"The only reason she even thought to stop at all was cause I told her to runt. If I'd left her like that she would have let that crazy animal run off a cliff."

"From our vantage point Inuyasha, there wasn't any cliffs near by. Besides the horse was following us."

"Certainly didn't keep her from almost breaking her neck. If I hadn't caught her who knows what would have happened. Just kill the damn thing. We can cook it for dinner."

An irritated snort came from the beast in question, as if to say 'Just try it, I dare you.'

"We don't exactly have money for a better horse Inuyasha. Unless you are joining us again?" Miroku's question brought everyone's curious eyes away from their passed out friend, to the half demon in question.

For a moment Inuyasha was silent, his intense gaze fixed on Kagome, taking in her relaxed features, that soft raven hair he loved, her strange new outfit, and finally the strands of braided silver hair branding her wrist.

Unbeknownst to his time traveling companion, he had been watching the deal she had made with Sesshomaru. Had seen her catch breakfast all by herself. Watched as she used skills of her own and quick wit to get what she needed from his half brother.

She was getting stronger but she still had a long way to go. All of them had seen her withdrawing into herself lately, noticed she was losing her self confidence. He hadn't exactly helped matters by pointing out her faults.

He had thought if he were blunt about it that she would take matters into her own hands. As always though, Kagome never made things easy. Always needing to learn things the hard way to get a point across.

The slap had never been intentional. He had gotten impatient and things had gone downhill from there. Yet the effects were more than he could hope for. Even if it meant temporarily being separated from the group.

He had always been close by. Just because the girl suddenly grew a backbone didn't mean she was never in danger. She attracted trouble like a bee to honey. It was plain ridiculous how many times she had almost died in the past two days and had no idea about it!

"She needs time to figure things out. Stupid wench is too used to me doing everything for her, it is about time she learned how to do things on her own. We all agreed to that. She's already done great and its only been two days. I'll come back when she can depend on herself."

The group sighed. They knew she needed this, but it was hard to put her through it. Kagome had been so depressed lately and all their earlier efforts were either ignored or brushed away.

Her meetings with Sesshomaru hadn't been expected either, yet somehow in some strange, seemingly impossible way the stoic lord had given their friend confidence that they hadn't seen in a long time with something as simple as a few strands of hair.

Who knew what the future would bring?

A clawed hand began smoothing inky black strands, rubbing the dark silk between rough fingers slowly, as if to remember one last time how they felt, before letting them go.

He cared for her. Hell, he couldn't remember the last time he cared so much for someone. Yet Kikyo was still on his mind. It wasn't fair to this girl, no, this woman, to keep waiting on him.

There was no helping it, when he looked at Kagome, he couldn't help but see the similarities to the priestess who had stolen his heart all those years ago. The love of his life whom he thought had betrayed him. Who was still roaming this earth with only hate for him fueling her steps.

The raven haired beauty before him didn't deserve to waste her life on something neither of them could fix. No matter what happened with Kikyo, it wouldn't end well. Kagome deserved someone who saw only her. That feisty woman with fire that could keep any demon on his toes.

He wasn't that guy. He couldn't make her happy. Hell he made her nothing but depressed! It was a wonder she kept coming back to be completely honest. That didn't change how he felt. The girl had a piece of his heart. In the end, he knew he would never ask for it to be returned.

"Take care of her okay." the half demon's voice was strong, yet his eyes held warmth and a touch of loneliness. He would have to stick to the shadows. He would never be far, but that didn't change how much he would miss her.

The group nodded, their eyes focused on the woman child who had brought them all together.

"We will." The answer came unanimously. They would protect her with their lives.

With a swish of silver hair and red cloth, he was gone, disappearing into the shadows of the evening, no doubt watching his pack, keeping them safe from a distance as soft eyelashes flutter open, revealing disoriented dark blue orbs.

* * *

I'm not gonna lie, who ever came up with the saying to get back in saddle again must have been a very brave soul. Or maybe they just didn't have a crazy nutcase for a horse. Whatever the case may be, I was more than a little nervous.

We had stopped for the past few days in a quiet clearing, visiting nearby villages for any news of the jewel shards or Naraku sightings before returning back to camp, as we did not have much money for lodging and apparently Miroku's con artist ways had lost their touch.

Couldn't help it if people weren't as gullible in these parts.

During our down time, I began learning horseback lessons. So far they weren't going that well. Time after time I was thrown off. Today I would try a different approach. Fuko was currently grazing, and if there was one way to an animal's heart, it was through its stomach.

During our travel, we had come across an apple tree. I made sure to stock up quite a few along with other things for our travel. Can never pack enough free food after all!

"Oh Fuuuuko!" Her ear twitched, black tailed swishing almost whiplike at me. Seriously, where did this girl get off having such an attitude?

"I got something for you~" I called out sweetly, holding out my prize, the red skin gleaming in the warm sunlight.

Her demeanor changed instantaneously. Gone was the stuck up horse ready to buck the crap out of me at her first opportunity. Replaced was a happy nicker, hooves digging excitedly into the ground with hearty expectation.

"Come over here you big glutton," I laughed, waving the fruit enticingly at her.

Practically dancing, the mare pranced over, nuzzling my hand in her exploration of this rare morsel, lips flickering around, tongue tasting…

Then out of no where my whole hand was in her mouth. I bit back a yelp, resisting the urge to pull my hand back. There was a strong possibility I could lose my hand with any rash actions. Though she had my hand firmly latched onto, her teeth were gentle and was in no way harming me.

I stood there, trying to stay calm, looking into those playful gleaming eyes.

She had known my plan, and she seemed to be conveying that she would not be won over so easily. I really hate it when they're smart.

I bit back an irritated sigh. "Okay I get it. You are smarter than you look. You can have the apple. No strings attached alright." Dark brown eyes stared into my blue ones, her right ear pointed toward me, listening to every word.

She still wasn't letting go. What else could she want from me? I wasn't above pleading for my hand back, yet somehow I felt as if she would dismiss my groveling, or ignore it altogether.

Instead I raised my free hand, slowly placing it on her forehead, petting her gently. A soft breath caressed my face, and delicately she let go of my hand. It was covered in slobber, but at least it was whole, every finger right where they should be.

I kept my hand where she left it, holding out her gift with a wide open palm, hoping the test of courage was over. Not sure I could handle my hand in her mouth for the second time in one day.

This time the apple was gently bit into, the left over pieces falling back into my open palm. Perhaps next time i should cut them into fours. Oops.

The horse continued gorging until there was nothing left. I wasn't sure if a horse was okay eating the core of an apple. Perhaps next time I was home I'd look that up.

My left hand again raised to pet her, and she allowed it, pushing her head into my searching fingers, apparently content with my curiosity.

"That was most impressive Lady Kagome. We were very worried for a moment there." Miroku, Sango, and Shippo had come over, and I could still see their nerves strung up tight.

It wasn't every day a horse has a craving that only hands can satisfy. (Disclaimer: I do not own this statement!)

"What can I say, I make friends best when they are trying to kill me." We all had a short laugh at that. After all, that was how all of us met in one way or another. As if to prove my point, Fuko began sniffing my hair, before nuzzling her face into it. Somehow, without even trying, I had won her over.

I really do have the strangest friends.

She still was a pain to ride. For now I walked by her side, deciding that when she wanted me to ride her, she would let me. It wasn't like we were going anywhere anytime soon. Besides, I think I've had enough near death experiences for one week.

Instead I focused on getting stronger. Sango had refuses to begin teaching me anything until I built up the strength and endurance for it, so for now, drills were my new best friend. Running wasn't too hard, it was just my endurance that I had to fight with.

Every day Sango would have me do something new to improve my strength, whether it meant climbing a ridiculous sized tree and somehow gathering the courage to get back down, which I had to to do five times a day, or doing lunges through the clearing.

My legs really hated me it seems.

Miroku on the other hand was teaching me to meditate. Something I was apparently terrible at. I'd close my eyes, try to focus, yet all I could think about was what would be next? What would we eat for dinner? What was Inuyasha doing right now?

Breakfast and dinner were now my duties. For the time being, I had only been able to catch fish. Today though, I was released from my friends a little earlier than usual, and decided I would try my hand at hunting.

Excited, I grabbed my bow and arrows, as well as my hunting knife and bag that I usually used to carry fish. If nothing else, this would be something new to do.

Kilala seemed to sense my departure, as not one moment after leaving camp did she magically appear on my shoulder, purring her own excitement.

It was still late afternoon, the sunlight causing shadows to start appearing on the ground, yet the humidity was smoldering. Sweat dripped heavily from my hair, which I had tied up in an attempt to rid of the damp mess.

Every step seemed to make some sort of noise, a cracking of sticks, crushing of leaves. I was apparently very bad at this hunting thing. Perhaps I would be lucky and find an animal that was deaf. I'd most certainly have an advantage right.

For awhile the world was quiet, and I worked on my footwork, paying extra attention to how I walked, to steadying the pace of my heartbeat and breathing. Then, finally, a creature appeared, its black eyes staring down at me, tail flicking to and fro.

The moment that I had tried to reach for an arrow, the squirrel had already disappeared, likely never to be found by my unexperienced butt ever again.

I let out a low growl of annoyance and grabbed my arrow, learning from my folly and this time prepared for the next time. Next time I would be ready.

Yet after an hour of hunting and not even one lucky shot I was getting discouraged. That was when I heard it. A frightened squeal filling the air.

Forgetting for just a moment what era I was exactly in, I ran toward the noise, only thinking of the possibility of bringing home a meal for my friends. What I came across was unexpected and unnerving.

Hiding behind a tree, I peaked out at the sight, not quite sure what I was seeing. There was a girl, her long black hair hanging around her in an almost wild display, fire and pride burning in passionate brown eyes, body crouched over the ground on all fours, little baby fangs holding a still rabbit from her mouth, its head twisted in an abnormal direction as her small hands held it still.

What…the…hell.

"Rin. Well done." The cool, calculating voice came from my left, yet the sight of him did not surprise me. He wasn't the one sitting there with a poor bunny hanging from his mouth after all.

No I was more focused on the girl I had always thought to be sweet and innocent, acting like a wild animal. Had she broke the things neck herself? I pushed the bile back, trying not to think to hard about it or to focus on how there was specks of blood dripping from her lips.

"Lady Kagome!" the deceivingly innocent tone was back, and if not for the blood on her face and her victim on the ground, I would have fell for its sweet song.

"Rin…did…did you kill that rabbit?" I couldn't help the question, the answer was right in front of me, and yet, I still refused to believe that the girl that loved picking flowers and staring up at the clouds singing childish melodies could be this…cold blooded killer in front of me.

With the smile only a fallen angel could make she nodded, her eyes sparkling with joy.

"Yup! Lord Sesshomaru taught Rin how. It took Rin all day but Rin did it!" Her happiness radiated out of her, and I could tell without a doubt this girl was proud of herself. Why shouldn't she be. Here I was, almost an adult, and I hadn't caught one thing. This girl was like, 8 years old, and she caught a rabbit with her bare hands.

How could I judge her just because she didn't need a bow and arrow to make a quick and efficient kill. She had every right to be basking in this moment.

Unintentionally, my eyes drifted over to her fair haired guardian, his intense golden eyes practically gave me frost bite from where he stood. His message was clear. Do not upset his ward in this moment.

I smiled slowly, noticing how his ticked eyebrow returned back to its normal position and his eyes only just slightly melted from their frosty state at the sight of my nonjudgemental gesture.

"That is great Rin. I'm seriously impressed! You need to teach me how you did that sometime!" Hey if you can't beat them, join them right? Obviously my archery skills weren't quite ready for hunting yet.

If an 8 year old could catch a rabbit with her teeth, why couldn't I.

"Ooh Lord Sesshomaru! Can we teach Lady Kagome!? Can we?" For the first time I saw Sesshomaru smile. The predatory look on his face was probably the scariest thing I have ever seen in my life.

God help me!

* * *

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